A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone.So I need help. I cheated on my boyfriend of 5 years with a guy friend I've known for about the same time. My boyfriend and I are not as passionate and our relationship is slowly falling apart.. I have a tight group of friends and my one guy friend is pretty good friends with my boyfriend. Anyways, so my guy friend and I were by ourselves and we were both pretty drunk. We admitted to liking each other.. I'm not sure if he actually meant it or if he was just drunk. I stayed the night at his place and we made out and ended up having sex. In the morning, instead of me running off, we had sex 2 more times, cuddled, talked and held hands. I think I remember him asking "so what are we now?" and I said we are just "bros" and also told him that he could never tell anyone.So I texted him a week later and asked if he wanted to go for coffee to clear things up... (because this has been driving me crazy) He said clear what things up... and I was like well I don't want it to be awkward between us! He asked if I was going to a friends this weekend and I said yes and he said "no" as a joke "because it might be awkward". Lol. He said that it won't be awkward and that he will be at my friends and that we will pretend nothing happened... I'm not sure if this is a bad thing? Here I started having feelings for him- so I feel kinda used and stupid atm... I'm kinda bummed that he didn't wanna "clear things up" and I'm scared that we might repeat another hook up in the future!This guy is also super shy! He isn't open with a lot of people but before we hooked up we talked about other stuff like family and friends... He said i was one of the only girls he could talk to like this. He is also part of my main social circle so I will be seeing him mostly every weekend... How do I handle this situation? Does he like me and is scared because I have a boyfriend? I don't wanna tell my boyfriend because he will be so hurt and if I tell him I will lose all of my friends... Help would be greatly appreciated.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2012): He's not really your boyfriends friend because lets be honest who would do that to a friend he crossed the line. Further more, you had sex in the morning so it wasn't a drunken thing, you wanted more.
It sounds to me like you are now stringing your boyfriend along, because you want to see what will happen with this guy. But lets be honest nothing can happen because you are all friends, so no matter what it will break your boyfriends heart.
Why don't you just leave your boyfriend and have a civil breakup and remain friends, you have crossed the line, let him go and be happy.
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