A
female
age
30-35,
*ashana
writes:I had sex with a guy that i really like too soon and after our intercourse he has been distant,he dosnt call or visit and when i do call he dosnt answer so i stopped.I was hurt and i just cant stop thinking about him,i want to for get him but i dont know how.please help me cause i know its tearin me down mentally. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, sashana +, writes (1 May 2009):
sashana is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you every one who took the time to help,i feel a great upliftment,i can tell myself now i will for get him and to be honest i'm starting to already.He was just a mistake,a mistake that i've learnt from.thanks again every body!:)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): hello,
I am sorry and I do sympathise. If it's any comfort you are not the only person to have been treated like this. I'm afraid I lost my virginity in a similar way and well, he never kept in touch :(
Try not to ponder too much, I know it is hard, but look after yourself. Take care, xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): I'm afraid you were just another conquest and only count as one notch on his bedpost, a second sex session with the same woman doesn't qualify for another. No doubt he's now looking towards getting his next notch from his next conquest.
Like satin says, you've been used.
However, not all men are like that, some have a lot more depth to their character and for whom sex is an intimate physical indication of their love for you. I know it's not easy sorting the wheat from the chaff when it comes to men but with a little more life experience you'll be able to spot a player rather more easily. A player has just one goal in mind - to get you between the sheets - and the nice guy will romance you and be in no particular hurry to get inside your underwear.
Don't give up your body so easily or quickly next time. The player will get tired of waiting and be off on his heels, but the nice guy will stick around.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): I see where satin is coming from and personally thats about my timeframe too. However wouldnt quite say that your scenario would necessarily have turned out better had you waited.
Look in terms of getting over this loser (im willing to bet here sex wasnt that good) Ask yourself what you really want from sex, is it to be love, affection , passion, caring and also awesome pleasure, if it is, those things dont just spring into being because your physically with someone, they take time to develop.
Now ask yourself do you deserve a guy who will want those things and let them develop, be honest with yourself , It sounds like you do, this guy obviously isnt it.
Plenty more fish in the sea and not all men are dogs.
Hope this helps
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): My advice is to all the girls out there reading this is, please DON'T have SEX unless you are ready and you know your doing it for the right reasons. I made a huge mistake in high school. I let a guy I barely knew, pressure me into having sex with him. I was blind. I mistook sex for love. I thought he loved me and I wanted to please him. All he wanted was to get into my pants. After we had sex a couple of times, he stopped being the protective and caring guy he was before. Clearly, I made the biggest mistake of my life, and I will always regret it for the rest of my life.
Your virginity is precious, you only lose it once, make sure you lose it to the right person. Respect your body, respect yourself.
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A
female
reader, oneandonly?  +, writes (1 May 2009):
We learn from our mistake, I knew my fiance for 6 months before I became his girlfriend, and I sex with him a month after I became his girlfriend, and he purpose 10 months after we started dating, moral of story, patience is a virtue. Never sleep with a man until yall are exclusive
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