A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of three years cheated on me i then found i was pregnant, we now have a 7mth old baby and i cant get past the cheating, he has alot of excuses the ones we hear all the time like it wasnt suppose to happen, it meant nothing etc... but after i found out, he promised he will make things right but he kept sneaking around and lying. He was such an a hole during my pregnancy we've been dealing with this over a year now I need help on this.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2009): Well, it doesn't serve you or your parents to carry on as if everything is perfect between you and your boyfriend when it's not.
I think you just start a dialogue with one or both of them about what is going on and ask for their support.
Be careful of getting into a relationship with this other guy so soon, you really need some time alone to kind of get your bearings.
If he is interested in you, he will agree to take things very slow for awhile, but don't break up with your boyfriend because you have someone else you think you like.
It is great if the boyfriend is good with the baby that is a good thing, but if he is not good to the baby's mom, that's another isn't it?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2009): Well its me again he actually takes good care of our baby but i definetly dont want to get married to him the thing dats actually keepin me around is my parents i dont want to let them down they still think everything is perfect, i also hav som1 who im very much interested in an i believe interested in me as well but how do i break it to my parents so i can clear dat slate an move on. thanks alot.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2009): Maybe what you need is a new boyfriend or to get rid or this one.
If he doesn't want to be a man and be there for you and the baby, nothing you can do is going to fix him.
You can try going to couples therapy though and maybe it will cause him to face up to his fears or his poor behavior or character issues, but it isn't a guarantee.
Are they any plans to marry since you have a child together? I definately wouldn't do that until you make a decision as to whether or not he is going to do the right thing in being faithful to you.
I am sorry, I know this is a hard time for you, but you don't have to put up with him, you have choices and your child deserves to be in a stable home where there isn't fighting and cheating going on. If that is one where you are on your own or one where you find another man who is going to stand up and be a man and be committed to you.
Without trust and committment you have no relationship.
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