A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I don't know what to say or do in regards to my grieving boyfriend. His grandmother passed away a few days ago; she's been sick for the past few months. He called me the night she passed away, and he seemed to be taking it well.I told him that I was there for him if he needed anything. I was there to listen or to just hold his hand. Since that night, I've been calling him and texting him to ask how he is, but he always responds with one sentence answers. I'm fine, thanks. I decided to give him some space since he obviously didn't want to talk. It's been a few days and he hasn't called. I wish he would see me as a pillar of support, but it seems that he wants nothing to do with me. I don't want to call him and just have him brush me off again. If I mention driving the one hour to see him, he ignores me and pretends I didn't say anything. What to do if he keeps pushing me away?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2010): he shouldnt be taking it out on you, hes being a bit selfish ignoreing you, yes he is hurting you too but.. he is sad and some ppl dont know how to deal with greif.. we all greive differntly, and some ppl can shut others out and really hurt those they love. He is obviously angry and not dealing with it well. dont crowd him,dont call him, dont visit, leave him for the moment, let him be moody and greive, he knows u are there and will eventually come to you for support.
but.. if he keeps pushing you away, maybe call one more time and maybe tell him that you feel for him and know he is greiving and sad and you are really sorry, but he is hurting you, you care for him and want to be there but you dont like it that he is ignoreing you and brushing u away, yu are his g/f adn u care, and.... that he will lose you if he keeps this up, then hang u and leave it at that. be calm and dont get emotional.
thats all i can suggest.
take care
hope this helps somehow,.
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