A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Honestly, I guess I just need to get some stuff off my chest. If you don't feel like reading a relatively long story I suggest you skip this oneIm 21 years old, and according to others good looking and muscular (I like to work-out) and studying @ college at the moment. Now, I used to actually be quite 'good' with girls. I don't mean this in an arrogant way or whatever but I can interact and communicate with people like you wouldn't believe, which is why all this is so confusing but ill get to that in a second.At primary school I always literally got chased by groups of girls, I did quite well girl-wise during my beginning years of high school though I never iniatiated sex at that time because I didn't felt ready. When I got a little bit older, (16-18ish) things started to get more serious with some girls (not at the same time obviously). My longest relationship was 2 months untill I caught her having sex with one of my best friends. It hurt obviously, and I had trouble getting over it. A very similar situation happened after that with another girl and there were some other quite painful experiences all having to do with my feeling betrayed by either girls or my best friends.Now, after multiple happenings like that I lost all confidence in girls and didn't even initiated conversation with girls anymore. I got more isolated from girls and I guess they could feel this or something. Ofcourse I felt very lonely at times, and I still do. Because I am very inexperienced sexually Im usually don't even approach girls anymore because I feel that I wouldn't be able to give them what they want anyway due to my lack of experience. Now I've always believed in the phrase 'If you make sure you are ready, you don't have to be ready' about a year or two ago I decided to study the woman body and all there is to know about pleasuring women both physically, mentally and emotionally when it comes to sex and relationships. Though I usually read 4+books a month (I'm curious about pretty much everything), I've probably read over thirty+ books alone on the topic of sex. I kid you not. Erogenous zones, techniques, stimulation, dirty talk, toys, tantric sex, the different types of orgasms etc. etc.. God, it's too much to even sum up and that's not even counting the dozens of videos and audiotapes I've listened to.Now you might get the impression I'm not outgoing and just stay at home studying stuff or whatever but the truth is I am! Put me in a room with 50 strangers and within the hour Ill know them all and they will know me, it's my talent I guess.But here is the thing, in the past three and a half years I made out ONCE with TWO girls. Now I know I should not let my confidence depend on the confirmation of girls but guess what, stuff like this does influence your confidence. Sure, I've tried to change this and approach girls in clubs, but I feel like I lost my 'mojo' and this in combination with the severe lack of sexual experience compared to the average 20+girl I truly feel hopeless. I see all sorts of guys around me with no social intelligence whatsoever, in great relationships and I see the superficial bullshit dudes hooking up with the single girls. I'm always left alone. I truly feel, lost.I know that stuff doesn't just 'come to you' so I try my best but after getting shot down a gazillion times lately (I guess because I sometimes have this vibe of 'searching', betrayed by my best friends and girls I truly loved I don't feel like trying anymore because even if I did, I would probably only dissapoint her in the bedroom or at least he first couple of times.Okay, sorry for the long story, I have plenty of more to share but I guess this is not the right place. Anyway, my questions clear and concise,-What should I do? Im truly lost-As a girl how would you feel about a guy inexperienced like me?If there is anything else you noticed or if your sixth sense is telling you something I would love to hear it, all the advice is welcome and once again sorry for the somewhat blur storyCheers.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2011): HOW'D YOU KNOW IF YOU WON'T TRY..hmm you know those girls who abandoned you simply are just not worthy of you,they didn't saw the beauty that's within you, you know, you don't have to be like this or like that just for somebody to like you, i strongly believe that if that person is for you,he/she will accept you fully, i mean, for what you are and most especially for what you're notyou just need to believe that other people also see the beauty that you see in you..so never ever lose your confidence, you're adorable,right?,never allow those "negative" happenings of your past be an obstacle for your happiness now and for the future..past is past,don't prison yourself in those rubbish thoughts, it will just lead yourself to chaos..if it didn't work before, maybe this time it will..give it a try, it's worth trying..always bear in mind that your beautiful,gorgeous, and attractive..be confident,girls will love that..believe in yourself :))i hope this helps
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