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Girl, You Can Get Over Him: 4 Tips

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Article - (28 May 2009) 3 Comments - (Newest, 11 June 2009)
A male United States age 41-50, deebee writes:

The story is as common as air - boy meets girl, boy dates girl, girl falls for boy. Soon girl discovers boy only wants one thing. Girl gets wise and rejects boy. Boy begs girl to take him back – he claims he will change. Foolishly, girl gives boy one more chance. Boy shows his true colors, girl hates herself for believing in boy. In the end, girl is finally convinced the relationship is doomed. Hence, girl wakes up from her love drunk stupor and dumps the unworthy lout one last time. But she can’t stop thinking about him - still has a glimmer of hope. It is a story most women have lived through. If you are that girl, here are four tips to help you move on and get over him.

1. Throw yourself a break up party.

Celebrate! Say goodbye to bad rubbish. Surround yourself with friends and unleash. Do all the dances you could not do if he was there. Get mad, cry, laugh and have a few drinks. Eat chocolate and do not worry about your waistline. This is not the time for self examination – at least for the moment.

2. Go from crying to buying

It’s called Retail therapy. Researchers are learning what shopaholics have known for a long time - the ultimate pick me up is to go shopping. Why not buy that bag you had your eye on? You know the one you didn’t buy because he would’ve implied that you are irresponsible with money. But do not over do it, this form of therapy can get expensive.

3. Get rid of everything that reminds you of him

First things first, erase all of his numbers from your mobile phone. While you are at it, eradicate his old emails. Second, throw away all those love letters, cards and gifts. Do not read them just one last time. Burn the cards and photographs, and give the gifts to charity. Rid yourself of all his memories - among other things – throw away the stained boxer shorts he left in your under your pillow. Finally, do not listen to the love songs that awaken memories of what could have been.

4. Do not contact him

Stand your ground - refuse to take his phone calls. Do not answer his emails or respond to his instant messages. No cyber-stalking on social networking sites. Stop driving by his house to see if his car is parked in the driveway, or to see if his room light is on at night. Don’t go back to places that you used to hang out together hoping you accidentally run into him. No! You can not be his friend, at least not until you are actually over him. Don’t pretend to be over him, just so you can be his friend. He will know you are faking it.

To finish, you are not alone, we have all been there. Don’t try to forget him by sleeping around. That will only confuse things. Don’t try to put pressure on yourself by reinventing yourself, or blaming yourself. Remember, the best way to get over someone is by getting on with your life, and living it well. Keep in mind time heals all wounds.

D.E. Boone is an award winning author. He is the creator of most the original book of its kind, "Legs Talk: A Modern Girl’s Dating Tale. Boone often looks at why our field of dating is so bumpy. He writes about life's personal challenges with a blend of sincerity, candor and of course, humor! To learn more, visit: www.Legs-Talk.com

View related questions: a break, drunk, money, move on

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A female reader, MidnightSky United Kingdom +, writes (11 June 2009):

MidnightSky agony auntawesome! XD

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009):

well well, il give you a working receipe to that problem. id do 4,3,2,and 1 in that consecutive order as well. id break up ALL contact with that moronic idiot, get rid of everything that reminds me of the dick,cry him out of my head, and when im done il go for a shopping spree to uplift my self esteem and upgrade myself to a independent single sexy woman look. then il throw a party and me some greener pastures. a hot guy who fits my category. and i will forget that piece of crap who made my life miserable and would replace him with a man who 10 times the man he is.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2009):

best break up advice ever!

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