A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:ok well recintly ive pretty much given up on wantin realtionships for a while so ive aquired myself a few "friends with benifits", but the problem is i dont know if me and one of them are starting to have real feelings for eachother, this morning i went round to his house because his parents werent home, i ended up sucking him off and then because we werent sure when his parents were coming back we went out for a walk and ended up sitting on this like secluded patch of grass and ended up with me like lying on his lap just talking to him for about an hour or two then we went into town and he bought me a drink even though i had more money with me than him, and we have abit of a deal that since we're both virgins were gonna loose it to eachother when were ready, i dont know, i mean the only reason i gave up wanting a relationship is because i was sick of chasing guys that didnt like me back but i dont want to start falling for someone again, especially if it could result in me loosing one of my friends :/
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2011): When a girl is always chasing guys that don't like her back, she is usually chasing guys that are way out of her attractive range. Stick to your range and the respectful guys will be everywhere.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (4 June 2011):
 So instead of chasing guys you suck them off instead? You must have lots of guys who don't want relationships lining up for you now.
If you want a relationship, having 'FWB' isn't going to get you there. Instead, it's going to label you as someone who doesn't care about having a relationship, as someone who is content with some oral sex from time to time. It's going to work against you eventually, at your age you are still figuring life out.
Why would you settle for something less than what you want? Do you not deserve it? Because that is the message you are putting out there to the people around you. That you are happy with occasional blowjobs and no relationship.
You get what you ask for, as a rule. If you ask for FWB, that's what you get. And that's pretty much ALL you get.
Be brave. Dare to live with high expectations. Expect the best. Demand the best. Don't fritter your life away on random BJs with guys whose parents might come home at any second.
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A
female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (4 June 2011):
 How old are you?! At your age, you should not be having 'friends with benefits'. Just enjoy being friends! Plain and simple.
Until you are 16 - all sex (That includes blow jobs, hand jobs, oral sex and intercourse (vaginal and anal)) is illegal. You are underage. Boys will not respect you for just 'sucking them off' they will think you are easy, a tart, and will not respect you as 'girlfriend' material. You will get a reputation and it will not be a good one.
Giving boys sexual favours will not make them want you as a girlfriend, they will just want to use you.
You are too young to have given up on relationships, you are not old enough to understand what being in a relationship is all about.
Seriously, just let things happen naturally. DO NOT give sexual favours until you are in a committed relationship. You will feel far better if you just have a bit more respect for yourself.
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