A
female
age
,
*ralee
writes:I hope all are enjoying summer and thank all who respond to my question.So some background.A couple of weeks ago I brought two friends and a woman I met recently to a girls night out.It was a good time and we decided to meet again last week.The new acquaintance had us over to her place.It was not a great time to say the least.I usually had a good time.One of these women mentioned to me that she noted I had put on weight....I know this so strike one.I was probably still thrown when I got back to the patio and tried to be part of a conversation on tv shows.I have so little time or inclination to watch but tried to have an open mind.I mentioned a few shows I watch....blank stares and silence.The next topic was my job.Two of these people are teachers and one is a substitute.I teach students with developmental delay but they implied their jobs harder and more important.Here I started to get upset.If you knock me you knock my students..not cool.The evening finished with a couple more jabs and then talk of a movie night to which I would not be invited as how could a person who dislikes tv like movies.I drove one of them,home and vowed to cut my losses.I dont hang around people who disrespect me.They dont seem to be getting the.message that I need a break,possibly permanent from them.One send some pictures of an outing but I told her previously not to send on fb but privately...she was angry and removed them ...chidish.I have received a facebook and linkedin request from one and another send a message saying I am feeling sorry for myself and I need to"deal" whatever that means.One of them is a friend of ten years duration but she has been disrespectful in the past and I cant take it anymore.I shall miss her though....long time but she is the one continuing to be unkind.You are hearing only my.side.Perhaps I am hurt that I brought these people together and the chemistry not there.My questions are:Is ignoring them valid?I want no part of them now.If I want my space should I tell them? If a friend,particularly.one of ten years duration continues to disappoint is it ok to let them go.Thank you:)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (30 July 2015):
 I think when it comes down to friends and feelings, it's MUCH better to talk it out, EVEN if you want to drop them after.
I think venting can be very helpful. As in telling the lady who talked smack about your job/students that you actually took that personal and it hurt your feelings.
Don't be petty. That is what THEY are doing by excluding you from a movie night. I know many women who SAYS they value honesty... yet they rather go behind someone's back and get a few jabs in... So don't BE like that, if you don't like it. BE honest with them.
But yes, it's ALWAYS OK to let someone go who IS NOT a positive influence in your life. Honestly, I would just mentally "downgrade" her to "acquaintance status" and treat her as you would Mary the cashier at the store you shop at twice a week.
As for Face book drama.. *roll your eyes* and don't get caught up in it. The lady (if you "downgrade her") just HIDE your feed and/or hers, so you don't have to watch crap you don't WANT to watch.
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