A
male
age
30-35,
*av attack
writes: Me and my girlfriend have started dating about 6 months ago. We've been friends for about seven years now and we really care about each other. We can talk about anything and we get along great. We havent had sex yet but we still fool around in bed and it was actually pretty damn good until a couple days ago. I think im bored. What should we do. We both have no clue. Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2010): I wouldn’t classify your feelings as awful. You are still young in some regard, it’s perfectly natural to want to explore other things and look for an amazing sexual bond at our age. The fact that you’re bored but you love her and want to be with her tells me that as much as you might WANT to consider being the “settle-down” type because you may have found “the one”… you’re not fully prepared to do that. Your boredom might be stemming from your fears of commitment, or it might be your body language telling you that it wants a different challenge. It’s just normal for a lot of people, the important thing to do is keep it under control so you don’t end up breaking her heart or losing sight of yourself. If you’re not satisfied, you won’t be unless things change. My advice is to take a break and see if that’s what you REALLY want out of the relationship. Sex doesn’t make or break any relationship to be perfectly honest, it’s an important aspect… but like a lot of other things, it will fade over time. This might be a relationship for you that would be more meaningful down the line at some point, when sex isn’t the number one priority anymore.
A
male
reader, Rav attack +, writes (8 September 2010):
Rav attack is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your help! but i have to say that we have tried all that. weve bought toys experimented with different outfits and role playing. talked about fantasies. weve even sparked arguments to make it rough :P . i think i might be bored because weve tried almost everything!! which is why im really lost at this point. i want to be with her for a very long time because of how great we are together but i dont think we should if we dont have a sexual relationship. i know that sounds awefull but its how i feel.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2010): Be spontaneous. Go to different places, in different areas, even public sometimes can be fun and exciting. Try different toys. Try fantasies. Different positions. If you’re both not really the shy type, talk about what you want out of sex and the fun things that accompany it. Tell her what your fantasies are, ask her about hers. Every relationship reaches the point where it becomes a little stale and bored, but seeing as how this is a fairly new dating-type relationship, you just need to experiment more. If you put forth more effort, it'll definitely be noticed and returned. Have fun!
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