A
female
 ,
*onfusionz
writes:Hi, I have recently emigrated to another country with my 9 year old son. I am a single mother and have been for some time. My son has had very little contact with his father during his 9 years of life (even though his dad lived only 5 minutes down the road). He would only pop in and out of his life when it suited him. He does not support him in any way, financially, emotionally, spirtually in no way. Now and again he may give him something which would come months after my son has asked for it. I have tried not to make an issue of his inconsistencies but have got on with my life and have tried my best to provide for my son - basically just accepting the situation. My son was always happy to see his dad and I did not want to take that away from him but it was always one sided.The problem now is that as I have taken my son to live abroad with me, his dad has got in touch with me as he is holidaying in the same country. He wanted me to meet up with him so that he could have my son for a day or two. I did not feel too comfortable with the situation as I don't know where he is and neither does he know where we are. He wants to take him to see the family as apparently they all came over for Christmas to celebrate a birthday. Since my son's birth none of his dad's family has shown an interest in him and his dad did not do much to introduce his son to his family and now he wants my son to be among "strangers" who he doesn't really know. He said he would call back nearer the time when he wanted him but when he did call back I decided to ignore his calls as I decided that I did not want to take my son to meet him and I don't trust him either. He is due to go back home around the weekend so wants to see him asap. I have been debating with the thought about letting him see his dad but when I decided to migrate it was with the intention to put the past behind me and to move on. His dad really has not been a good father to his son at all. I did let his dad know that we were going away for good and it did not seem to bother him at the time. He offered no help or support in anything to do with us leaving. When we left I did not say goodbye as although he knew we were leaving, he still did not make any efforts to spend more time with his son. I have decided not to let my son see his dad so as to protect him for getting upset as he will not be seeing him again for a while. It seems to be a problem with his dad now that he has realised I am not answering his calls as I do not want to speak to him. He has now left threatening messages on my cell phone telling me that I had better let him see his son before he leaves, otherwise he is going to smash up my house which I have rented out back home. My older son is living there with some other tenants and I fear that when he does return home he is going to smash the place up. I don't really want to contact him as there will definitely be an argument which I don't want and neither do I want to meet up with him. I just want to be rid of him and for me and my son to get on with our lives. I have thought to report the threat to the police but have not done so as yet. I have also warned my elder son about the problem. What should I do?
View related questions:
christmas, move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (30 December 2009):
 You need to talk to a family attorney and get some good legal advice, and you need to go to the police, NOW!!!! You shouldn´t have to deal with this guy alone.
|
