A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been going out with my gf for nearly a year now and from the start I've wondered if she's really into me. Now I know a lot of this is maybe down to my insecurities but hear me out. She is a manager of 20 + people in her day to day and has a lot of responsibility and normally works 11 -12hour days. The problem I have is that when she gets any time off she's still on her work phone constantly/thinking and talking about work or doing other household stuff that needs sorting. the problem I have maybe selfishly is what about us? When is there ever going to be time for us to just chill /have fun together. If I get remotely intimate with her on her days off shell say she's busy and has to do the washing tidying etc and that tells me later on we can do that. Invariably later on comes and she's too tired and has to go to bed early or she makes up some excuse. This just leaves me massively frustrated. Even when we go away on holiday she tends to try and make excuses for not having sex or kissing saying she's I'll or aching or something to the point that I'm now starting to reLly question whether or not she's into me at all or whether I'm just her reliable Partner that fulfils other requirements in her life.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2011): it may not be anything personal, she may just be the kind of person who is always on the go and leads a very hectic life. some people just can't seem to slow down, are always stressed out. she could be like this if it were any other guy she was with. that doesn't change the fact that you feel neglected, but it may not be anything to do with you personally. she could just be ill-suited to cultivating any relationship with anyone. you've only been together a year, if you're not happy with the way things are you can always move on and find someone who isn't always rushing around.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2011): She's just not that much into you. She's into her work. I wouldn't take it personally, some people are just like that, they put their career first over a relationship. You have free will, you can choose to accept this or not. The ball is in your court, play it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2011): Ask her what she thinks makes a good relationship between a man and a woman. Don't pressure her as she could have some deep-seated problem she is trying to avoid. Try to reassure her so that she feels able to open up to you. Tell her how you feel.
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