A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I started a new job two months ago and although I sit wit a table of guys (the women sit at another table) recently I have noticed one of the girls acting differently towards me lately. I am not sure if she is jealous of the attention I get from my male boss who is very charismatic or it's something else. Although she says 'hi' when I see her in the morning, she has never come over to to speak to me (unlike the other women) and when she does speak to one of the other guys, she seems to want to avoid eye contact with me altogether! However, when I am on my own and go over to chat to her she is very talkative and I'm not sure if I'm imagining it, but it seems she keeps eye contact slightly longer than you would expect. Recently us girls went out to the pub for lunch and although this girl (call her Sarah), emailed us all with the attached menu to decide what we wanted, a few days later she sent another to say that there was a menu in her drawer if we wanted to come over and have a look at it. I came over when she was on her own and she seemed quite chatty and gave me the menu to look at. My friend didn't understand why she was asking us to come over to her desks when she had already sent a menu.I have started to feel attracted to her and not sure whether she feels the same. She tends to only speak to me if I am on my own but when we went to the pub, it seemed she was trying to avoid eye contact when I looked at her although she looked more frequently at everyone else, which upset me a little as I felt awkward and slightly ignored. However, on the way back, when we got into work whilst waiting for a lift she started chatting/asking questions when I was right next to her in less of a group.When we got back she called me over to help with a computer problem and she smiled and looked for quite a while and said 'thanks' but it feels that there is something more going on, particularly as I find myself becoming more an more attracted to her. I have noticed as well that 90% of the time, when she sends group emails I am always the first name on her distribution list which I find a bit odd as I don't really know her to talk to all the time. My question is, why does she avoid eye contact when we are in a group?Could she be attracted or interested in me, or does she just not like me? By the way, we are both straight (she has a boyfriend and I think I may be bi-curious now)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, AuntyAlexxmo +, writes (23 October 2011):
 I agree she definately has some sort of strong feeling towards you and i dont think they are anything to do with her not liking you so that really does only leave on option.She may just be slightly confused, or she may be secretly bisexual and just not want to tell everyone at work. Either way she has a boyfriend, so i would just let her get on with it and see what happens.
A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (23 October 2011):
 She is certinally sending a lot of mixed messages. My advice is to ride it out for a while and see what happens. She obviously feels some kind of connection with you but until you are sure what that connection is it's best to take her as she comes. Just be yourself and carry on as you are.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Moo's Mum - no she's very outgoing and talks to everyone which is why I've picked up on the fact that she is like this with me...
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum +, writes (22 October 2011):
Maybe she is the type of person who finds it easier to talk to a person one on one and doesn't feel comfortable talking in a group?
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