A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I had an 'emotional affair' with a guy at work, who is is really brought the best out of me, a part i let go of until I met him. He reeled me in, I never found him attractive, but now I do, we felt for eachother no doubt, but I could not take the pain of his being married anymore and treated him harshly without explanation for a week or so to try to adjust my self ragrding him, he was pissed. anyway, we have hung out working together since and laughed etc...I talk about his wife now thinking it will help me along, but it hurts, well I am taking a break for 2 weeks from work, i think it will help, but lately, we have fun but I can sense that he is not looking at me purposely, not saying goodbye anymore, and now I'm like wanting his attention though it is the very thing I wanted to balance out...does he hate me, cuz now he is acting different spite my 'come back'. Oh and when i apologized for my behaivor blaming other things, he said nothing has changed between us nothing...so i told him good cuz you know i care about you and love, you he said same thing(as we confessed this before)..well now his behavior, especially knowing i'm going in and out of the work place for a while. Toaday he left without saying good bye but he did glance back at me but kept going...what the he--??meanwhile, i will be exercising everyday to get into shape for me again...I want to look good and be top shape for ME...any help is this another tactic on his part now cuz I tried to detatch and he CAN sense it, that's why he freaked??? Thanks
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male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (6 January 2009):
 You can only do things for YOU! I agree with the response below. This guy has a wife to fall back on. He seems to be feeling guilty about something however.
I would ask you to please try and not get too upset over it(if it's possible). I know it sometimes isnt, as we cant help who we fall in love with. But are you in love with HIM,or your feelings? They are two separate things
A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (6 January 2009):
You can only do things for YOU! I agree with the response below. This guy has a wife to fall back on. He seems to be feeling guilty about something however.
I would ask you to please try and not get too upset over it(if it's possible). I know it sometimes isnt, as we cant help who we fall in love with. But are you in love with HIM,or your feelings? They are two separate things
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A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (6 January 2009):
 You cut communication for a week? Well that was the killer seed! Treating him harshly with no explanation?
You can't play the chase game with a married person they live with different rules they can always fall back on their partners. And If you want to ever destroy your relationships cut all communication and watch it flake away.
If you really like him well what really can you do? be nice, be yourself don't play analytical games... Just take it cool, it will take time to re heal what has happened, and he needs time to build that trust in you again.
give it time and always be the best you can be, because that is what someone sees in a future partner.
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A
female
reader, loveuxoxo +, writes (6 January 2009):
 hun its good your r moving out of this situation! its the right thing cause he is married. and i know you like him but its best to get out before you get in way to deep. and i dont know him but i dont think he should being do this to his wife. and i dont think he cares abt you.cause he clearly doesnt even care/respect himself or anyone. so how could he did care about you if he doesnt care abot himself. cause its not far to you or his wife. your a terrific girl you deserve way more then him. if he would do this to his wife then that speaks a lot about him. and i suggest u just get over him. you deserve way better. so over your two week break just have you time and try to get over him. cause you deserve so much more then he can give you. hope this helps.
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