A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This is what my stories goes: (sorry that its long)I've been with my bf for more than 5 years. I used to be quite chubby but I've been trying all sorts of way to lose weight like pills and creams. However, there are many occasions where his words and actions are just hurting me and my confidence. I'm currently eating really little with the help of a pill and it did work out losing some weight. I'm 155cm, 45kg, vital statistics 34, 24.5, 35. I have average look. And recently I was busy with assignments which caused me to have terrible pimples. He complained in front of me and his sister saying that my face is getting terrible and stuff. I am really trying to cure my pimple and pimple scars. I'm spending my own money for facial treatments. I'm not really upset with his words since its true that I look ugly with all those scars. It is pretty clear to him that I am trying to improve myself right?The thing is that he watches porn every week. I do understand that watching porn in normal but there are other factors that cause me to feel like this. He also always mention about these 3 pretty girls, A, B, C (At least once a day). A is in the same class with us for some subjects. B is an old friend of his who no longer in contact but he still looks at her blog. C is an old schoolmate of mine which he saw her picture through my Facebook account (He doesn't have a Facebook account). All these 3 girls are skinny and look pretty/cute. He always jokes that he wants 4 wives, jokes about me being the fat, ugly wife while others are pretty or whatever which is positive (indirect way), jokes about some sex positions with them (eg. he nickname one of them rabbit and jokes that rabbit is good at cowgirl position). He also mention about these girls to his sister. I deleted C from my Facebook so that he can no longer view her pictures using my account. Few days ago, he told me his sister added her in her Facebook. He had used his sister's account last time. I am very very hurt by this because I'm suspecting that he is so desperate that he uses his sister's Facebook to look at her updated pictures. It makes me feel so ugly and fat that he rather go through all these hassle to look at other girls. I know that a guy thinking other girls pretty or attractive is normal but I wonder if my scenario is an exception to that rule. It has been months and months since he jokes about these girls. Deep down in my heart I wonder if he is joking or serious about it. I've talked to him about it. He says that A is getting uglier and that she might be a brat and he won't want her. Then he said that C has a bf. I really don't buy his words. I also asked him if he can stop mentioning about them but he says that I'm too serious and boring that I cannot even take a joke. To me, this is no joke but obsession. What should I do? I don't want to be sacrificing for a guy where our relationship will not work out.Thank you so much
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2010): This guy sounds like a real jerk and doesn't deserve you. I suggest you re consider being with him because your self esteem will only get worse.
Don't take diet pills because they can do more harm than good. Go to your doctor and get on a healthy eating and exercise programme.
A
female
reader, morphine-millie  +, writes (25 November 2010):
Ditch this utter loser. Seriously, you can do so much better, trust me he's making you feel worthless and is completely shattering your self esteem. Anyone who genuinely loves you will think you are the most attractive person in the world in their eyes and anyone who can say that to their girlfriend doesn't deserve her in my eyes. To love someone and be loved by someone, it is essential that you become happy with yourself and that includes your appearance; it sounds like you're unhappy with it so you're spending loads of money to make yourself look better for this guy. Only do that if it makes yourself happy. If you wait, you'll find someone who loves and appreciates you and thinks you're the most beautiful person in his eyes and that is how the best relationships are. Trust me it's worth the wait :) x
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