A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:should i be worried about this? :( basically I am in my first (potential) proper, long-term relationship. we have been official for just over a month now. I have had a string of bad experiences in the past, one after another therefore have quite a few insecurities. these are down to 3 guys IN A ROW chosing to be with their exes over me before i had even been seeing them a couple of weeks. although i am positive my new boyfriend isnt going to suddenly go back to his ex, the problem i'm having is that, unless we see each other, he barely contacts me :( i saw him for one hour on wednesday and since then i've only had 4 texts from him! :( i'm trying to be rational about it and not come across as clingy it's just hard to sit back and tell myself this is normal when he used to text me so much more than this. a massive drop in the number of texts has always been the start of my past relationships going wrong :(. he texted me this morning at about 10 o clock, and then again this afternoon at 3.30 to which i replied, and it is now 2am and i have not recieved a reply :(. though i did notice he had time to change his facebook status :/. on wednesday we planned we would see each other on saturday (today). am i just overreacting because of my insecurities? do people stop texting so much after a few weeks? ive never been in a proper official relationship like this so i dont have any idea :((he is 21 and i am 20)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2012): I think you are over reacting here, a month shouldn't be long enough for you to develop as strong as feelings as you are now- you don't really know the guy well enough yet. You need to focus on other things and learn to make yourself happy rather than waiting around for his texts all day. If you do this you will instantly make yourself more attractive to him.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (3 March 2012):
 Everyone is different in relationships and everyone has different needs and expectations. If you are feeling like you are not getting enough from him well then you be the one to contact him first, if he does not contact you back then the next time you see him just ask him why he is not texting as much as he used to. There is no harm in asking. It is still early days though and you are full of doubt and negativity, yes this is because of past experiences but don't let them hold you back. Just take things slow, remain positive and see how it goes. The more you worry about it going wrong, the more likely it will be to happen.
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