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female
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anonymous
writes:It was year ago today that I broke up with my longtime partner and things are getting better and better. For some reason, though the week leading up to the breakup day and the day itself have been hellish. I feel as raw and upset as I did on the day we ended it and was wondering if anniversaries of painful events can be difficult for people. I have just started to see someone new but it has not helped in this case I am afraid.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone who took the time to respond. All advice and words of wisdom appreciated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2006): It's normal to feel pain on these special dates, altho it doesn't happen to everyone. This just means that this person meant a lot to you and maybe you still care about them. If you say you're with someone new and it hasn't helped then I think it's becuz you are still in some way attached to your ex. It's ok to still think about your ex but you have to ask yourself why you haven't moved on. Find the reason if you want to feel better about this. Is there a possibility of a reunion between you two? Do you still hope for one? Sometimes even by us just thinking 'what if' keeps us attached to an ex. So try 2 figure out why there is still pain in ur heart, and hopefully then can u fix the problem. Good luck!
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reader, joanna44 +, writes (22 May 2006):
 it seems like your not complety over this guy, it is hard when you have been with someone for so long, certain songs and even tv programmes reminde you of past partners but there will come a time when you wont feel like this and the thought of your ex wont make you upset.the saying time is the best healer is definatly true, this will only get better in time.
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female
reader, Wendyg  +, writes (22 May 2006):
 Its because in your mind you didnt want to let go and probably still dont, it does become easier over time but only if you let it. Its a date in your head so your bound to know when its coming up, try and focus on the good things in life, nuture your new realtionship give it a shot. We all have to move on at some point in our lives and we all take memories some good some not so good, but we have to turn all things in a to a positive in order for us to make our way in the world. Learn from experinces, take bits of these with us, cling on to the good things not the bad and things will become gradually easier to bare.
Take care
x x
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2006): Depends on the event. Though I am mostly (abou 97.6% - haha) fine, I still tend to think about stuff now and then, but even then, I don't quite feel as 'hurt' as before. However, there are some stuff that may pop into my mind and a huge surge of anger nearly overwhelms me, but due to a learned talent from somewhere, I shut off the memory as best as I can or dilute with something else.
I believe over time, it will be so diluted that the feeling won't really be there anymore. Some nostalgia yes, but not quite negative emotion. Understand?
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