A
female
age
36-40,
*issUnique
writes:Hey. Well I'll start off by saying I've never been in love. I believe in it but I've never really liked anyone enough to think it is love. Now I've moved recently and I've met this guy. He's a narcissistic egotist. He annoys me so much and now we have this love-hate relationship going on. We argue over things that don't matter but this time it's different than other boyfriends. I asked my friends for help and they said it wasn't love, that hate is just a passionate emotion and it's all derived from there. But even though we can hate each other one moment, it all just turns bipolar the next. I really do like him and he is completely different than me but strangely enough, I'm willing to start an actual relationship with this guy. We talked about this and he seems more eager than me. I don't have a very good relationship history but with this guy I have an idea how it'll all end, but I'm still willing to begin. Is this weird? Or is it love? Ooo..I hate this guy for making me feel so confused :] Thank you to anyone for answering! It means a lot. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (18 April 2009):
It's a well known fact that the sex you have with your partner when you are making up after an argument is some of the best around.
So I think you and this guy are going to have a great time hating each other and then feeling incredible lust.
However, I think you run 3 big risks.
1. You are going to spend a lot of time arguing and hating this guy so you'll probably spend a lot of time talking to your friends about it. That's going to get really boring for them, REALLY fast.
2. If this relationship gets physical sexually then there is always a risk it will get physical when you argue. It's just the passionate nature of some relationships that this will happen. That doesn't make physical abuse any more acceptable and it can get REALLY dangerous for both of you.
3. If one of you does fall in love then you will carry this on past the point where it is fun, and even past the point where it is healthy.
This does not sound like love to me. Yes it's passionate but love can be passionate yet gentle too. There are hundreds of levels to love, where as this is just the passion.
So yeah! Go out with him, have a great time on the rollercoaster that it will be, but when the lows get to be more than the highs, be smart and WALK AWAY.
If you don't think you are strong enough or clever enough to know when that is going to be, then don't get into it.
Good Luck!! xx
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