A
female
age
41-50,
*hrivinmom
writes:I have been separated from my husband for quite awhile now. Anyhow to make a long story short I have 4 kids, one of which is with him. Last week I was on vacation with my parents. He had our child and I had a friend babysit my other kids at my house. Anyway, he was a big baby while I was gone, upset when I hadn't text or called him first thing ( I was 4 hour time difference.) Trying to make me feel guilty etc. I knew that he had gone to my house a time or two when I was gone but when I got home I found out there was more to the story. Come to find out my friend had asked him to come over and roast hot dogs with the kids. He came at like 3pm. Well they (he and her) finished off a pint of rum, ran out and he went and got more. They continued to drink and supposedly flirt (sitting close to each other, hugging ) until after midnight. Not to mention my kids had school the next day!! Then I was told he drove my daughter home to his house while he was drunk!!!!!!! I am livid! My question is do I continue to just ignore him (this has sealed the deal with me on deciding to divorce) or do I confront them because I know it will do no good they will deny. I need a clever way to handle this! She does not know that I know everything but I did ask her if he drove my daughter home drunk....she of course said no. I also do not want him watching my daughter while I am out of town again!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 April 2015):
 Next time you are out of time DON'T ASK him to watch her.
How do you know about all this drinking that "supposedly" went on?
Personally, I would not bring this up. I wold instead have a chat about rules for when he has the kid(s) - such as NO drinking (getting drunk, I mean a beer or two is fine, but 1/2 bottle of rum? no). It's common sense, specially if he needs to drive. WHAT if something had happened and he needed to take the child to the ER? He shows up smelling like Captain Morgan?
And your "friend" invites your soon-to-be-ex-hubby over and then drinks and flirts? WHAT kind of friend is that?
As for him acting like a baby while you were gone expecting you to call and text... does he REALIZE that you are separated for a reason? And that reason is that YOU do NOT want to BE with him (or him with you) no more? Unless you NEEDED to talk to your daughter or about your daughter WHY would you need to text/talk to him on your vacation?
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