A
female
age
41-50,
*eautifulLife1218
writes:Okay, so my last post was on my FWB situation. I was seeing a guy as FWB for about three months who would not commit.I had developed feelings for him that he was not reciprocating due to "commitment issues" from his divorce (1.5 years ago) I broke things off with him, then started to date other people. I am currently dating a new guy who is GREAT. Treats me well, is smart and funny, and wants a serious relationship. However, I don't feel a "spark" with him.. not at all. He's very good looking as well, but I just don't feel the attraction and connection to him like I did with my previous FWB. I hadn't spoken to my FWB in about a month or so, but every so often HE would text ME out of the blue. I would respond, but in vague responses, sometimes not even write back. About a week ago he began to text me full force, and we ran into eachother friday night. (his best friend, who is also an old, close friend of mine took me to a chamber dinner as his date. Appearantly our friend had called him to ask his permission to take me????) He hung around us like a hawk the entire night, and waited at the after party BY HIMSELF until we got back from the dinner. He then brought up to me our previous situation, saying he had told me from the beginning he wasn't ready for a relationship, and then I turned around all of a sudden expecting more. I told him I hadn't expected our "realtionship" to go more than one night, it did, I HAD developed feelings, but they were gone, and I was over it and dating someone else. He then proceeded to say he had behaved like an asshole and asked me to go out to dinner with him on wednesday. (He has never taken me out on an actual date before). I told him if he ever wanted to see me again, than yes.. he would have to take me out on an actual date this time and such.We spoke the next morning of possibly "trying things again"(via telephone, I did not go home with him), and I brought up what he had mentioned the night before about the date (we had been drinking a bit the night before ;) and I really, really want to because I feel so much for him.. and around where I live it is VERY hard to find good looking, smart and funny men who you are actually attracted to and connect with.I know the new guy is crazy about me and would commit to me and treat me like I deserve, but do I choose that man over the one I feel connected with on all levels because of that??? Or do I give the guy that my mind (and body) are drawn to another chance, even though I know it would probably land me in a world of hurt..... or does it seem like he might have realized his mistake???I keep thinking maybe the reason I'm not connecting with the new guy is because my mind is still set on the old one... maybe the attraction and connection will come???? With time??? Guys and Gals... I'm not used to actually dating, and I have no clue what the "F" I am doing here. Is the connection usually always there right away? Or does it eventually come sometimes? I've gone out with him 4 times now...Bottom line- I need to make a choice!!! Which one??!! I need to pick one, or I could loose them both....
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