A
female
age
30-35,
*ngel_of_xbl
writes:HELP!!! (Extremely long)I've gotten myself between a rock n a hard place here ppls. I've been with my g/f for over 9mts now. it has been graet except for the past 7 weeks or so. it's like just lately she gets on my nerves constantly. i honestly do not kno why. i do love her n i care about her just as much as when we first got togehter but now i can barely stand to be with her for more than 5 min! i wnat to end it but i kno for almost a fact that if i do she'll end up killing herself. she has admited this to me before on multiple ocasions. n i am afraid that once i do end it, that she;ll do that n i kno i'll carry that guilt with me for hte rest of my life. n i don't kno if i can deal with that. i'm unhappy in my relationship, but i'm not sure if my unhappiness is more important than her life. on top of that...... i'm startin to like another girl like alot! n for me to even say that i like her is a big thing. i don't truly like girls, 95% of the time it's just a sexual attraction at first then it gets old n i move on. Which is why this one is so much more different. since, when i met her She had told evry1 she was strait. n she was clear with me that we could b friends but only if i understood she was strait n i respected it. which i did. i clearly understood n respected it...then i started likin her. n i got the feeling that it was mutual one day so i started a conversation with her n said " I heard from sum1 that u wern't as strait as you'd like evry1 to beilive" n basically she told me that she used to b Bi. But that part of her life was the past now since she had found god n had been saved.( i'm not a christian, but i respected her when she told me that.) So i had it stuck in my head that she was strait n there was no way it'd ever happen...but my mind wasn't so easily convinced. n i ended up goin to her house with the intentions of stayin the nite. but i knew that if i was to have stayed the nite that i wouldn't have been able to control myself n i would've tried sumthing. and i didn't want to offend her or push her away, so i left at around 10pm n went to another friends house. but since then we have txtd all day evryday when ,were not in skool. One nite when i was high i let it slip that i liked her alot (on the phone with her!!!) n she told me that she liked me too! so i made plans to go over to her house n get tutored in my US History class (i was/am failing)...well long story short i didn't relle study, n we ended up cuddling on her bed n just talkin for lik 2 hrs then we ended up making out. n when we were cuddling my heart was racing ( i kno cause i was nervous) but i think it was cause of sumthin else. but when we kissed i felt this almost explosion in the pit of my stomach. i've never felt anything like it b4 w/ne1 else i've ever kissed. n it just felt so natural n rite. then we talked summore n actually did sum work. but since that nite we've txtd each other from the time we get out of skool to the time she goes to bed. n evry nite she tells me how much she wishes i was there with her n how much she wants me (which is exactly the way i feel about her), but i have only one problem... i have a g/f i'm afraid to break up with.I NEED HELP ASAP on this one!!! i dunno who to end it with...or how!
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reader, angel_of_xbl +, writes (29 November 2008):
angel_of_xbl is verified as being by the original poster of the question me n her broke up tonite. it hurts like hell.i wanted to thank evry1 who posted their advice/opinions.thnks,Angel XX
A
female
reader, angel_of_xbl +, writes (26 November 2008):
angel_of_xbl is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni appreciate ur answer i relle do.
but i am afraid that she will lock out ne1 who tries to help. it's just her personality. n i kno i need out,but i'm afraid no1 else will b there for her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2008): Dear Poster
You cannot stay in a relationship because you are scared the other person will kill her self; that is allowing EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL.
I suggest you talk to your girlfriend and explain to her that you want out; yes, she might be upset and make threats but she is not your responsibility and you have the right to be free and be happy. If you are worried about her doing something stupid try to arrange for her to have friends or family nearby and or inform them of her threats and ask them to keep an eye on her. She is emotionally blackmailing you and that on it's own is not healthy for a relationship, but it is not a good enough reason to stick around for.
I suggest you get yourself out of this relationship before you get involved with anybody else; it will also help to ease the break up with your current girlfriend; she will probably react worse if she knows there is somebody else. Keep your side clean and break up first; be very calm when dealing with her and I suggest you avoid going into to much detail or reasoning.
I do suggest your girlfriend should get counseling as her threats are indicating emotional abuse and she probably have a very low self esteem.
Best wishes; lots of smiles and keep us posted.
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