A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About one in a half years ago I did something bad. well my boyfriend now, we've been together for a year in a half now, well before we were together we were together for a month and broke up but i can't remember why. Anyways he decided to get with allot of girls and i was pissed so i decided to date his cousin BIG mistake. I know it was wrong but evne though i dated him i did nothing with him but kiss him. Now my boyfriend has never ever got over it. So he now watchs me when a guy walks by to see if i'm looking even if i glance just to see who it is he freaks out. I don't hang out with my friends EVER. I don't want to break up with him or nothing because i love him more then life i just want to kno what to do. I'm starting to get depressedhelp please
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female
reader, Susan Strict  +, writes (26 June 2008):
 He has the problem, not you.
You broke up. You dated someone else. It happened to be his cousin. OK so you deliberately picked his cousin to annoy him. So what?
If he's now THAT jealous and possessive that you can't even look at another guy or go see your friends, then he has a serious problem and quite honestly however much you think you love him you really don't want to be in a relationship like that. It's going to cause you problems over and over again. He has no reason to mistrust you because you never broke his trust and you clearly aren't going to.
If he can't get rid of his insecurity then your relationship just isn't going to work. Have a talk with him and explain it to him - and if he doesn't listen and take notice then you know you aren't going anywhere with him. You'll have to face the fact that you're going to have to find someone else - and if you don't do it now then you'll have no choice later. That's just how it is.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2008): This guy sounds really insecure. Granted dating his cousin wasn't the smartest thing but if you didn't have sex with him then it shouldn't be a big deal. Problem is insecure people tend to blow everything up. Chances are he just gets angry all the time & is using his cousin as an excuse to justify his anger. You're not the one with the problem, he is. Pretty soon he's gonna catch you looking in another guys direction or see a number on your phone. Then he's gonna get real pissed & use it as an excuse to hit you or cheat on you.
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