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Crushing and strong feelings. I want him to be a part of my life. Does it sound like he wants the same?

Tagged as: Crushes, Dating, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 April 2017) 2 Answers - (Newest, 6 April 2017)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

So I'm a 22 years old female and I'm dating a 29 years old man, my question might sound random and weird but I would really like to know. So I like this man and he says when he wakes up I'm the first thing that pops to his head all day long, when he says that I wonder what he means because for me I just can't stop thinking about him , literally not a minute passes by without him on my mind, I do have a life besides him and he knows that well but at all times I want him to be a part of it. Can he mean that he feels that as well ? Because my friends told me that he is older and not like us and that I shouldn't give in to it too much, am I being immature ? Or is it normal or what ?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (6 April 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntYour letting your mind run away with you. There is not much off a gap between you both, you are not 15 and he is not 50! You probably are much on the same page as I do find girls in their 20s can mature more than men. So go with the flow and enjoy the relationship.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2017):

You're over-thinking things big-time. He's only 29, not 60!!!

Calm down and don't let yourself go romanticizing the daylights out of things. You're no longer a daydreaming school-girl. Time to be mature and look at things as a woman. All that gaga stuff about "thinking about" each other all day is just the beginning. It's all new. The shine wears off.

It takes time for the chemistry to take hold and you've got to stay level-headed; so you can evaluate him to make sure he's a good match. Not just your mind getting carried away with idealizing everything about him.

Calm down and take your time. Make sure your feelings are based on reality and not fantasy. What he says is nice; but don't blow it completely out of proportion. You, like far too many females, are craving the words "I love you!" That could come out the mouth of a devil! Those words are mind-numbing and stupefying to women. Take his words for what they're worth. Don't bounce the check!

Get a grip, girlfriend. Ease on down the road! Don't go running with scissors, or you'll hurt yourself! His feelings are still being processed, and so are yours.

Get to know him, his quirks, how he handles his temper, his life-goals; and not just what you've spoon-fed him a list of all the goodies you're looking for. Guys will tell you what you want to hear. They just repeat what you tell them on a date, or say sweet stuff girls like to hear. He's being charming. It's got to be stuff he says without a cue from you, and his actions have to outdo his pretty words. Clear your head! Don't think about him too much!

He is more experienced, but he's still in his twenties. You should slow your roll no matter what age the guy is. Getting head over heels too soon is rushing things; and not very mature. You're not a teenager. If you can't stop thinking about him, you're overthinking! That's how you get infatuated; and it's mostly hormones and a build-up of dopamine. You're happy you've met a guy you like, and only time will tell how much he truly likes you.

Focus more on how you're treated, words are cheap. Don't let your reactions to things said send you gushing all over the place. You've got to project calm, class, and maturity. Regardless of his age. You're past your girlish-enthusiasm stage.

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