Cheating wound

A male age 30-35, anonymous writes:

my girlfriend and i have been dating for 2 years now and i absolutely love her. Our relationship is pretty flawless in almost every way and im pretty sure she is the one for me. however in the beginnings of the relationship, she kissed four different guys at various parties after getting unbelievably drunk. I took her back and after the last one she completely changed for me and things have been amazing. I am worried that the beginnings have left a scar. Though it has been around a year and a half i do not completely trust her again and i am very jealous. I occasionally have dreams where she cheats on me again, mimicking the behaviour she once showed. I intend to spend my life with this girl but i cant go on with this raging jealousy and it is unfair on her to be in a relationship where she is not trusted. This is my problem and i wish to know if there is any obvioius reason why it has affected me so deeply and i cant recover after such a long time of amazing love-filled relationship. She is my first in all areas if this helps

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