A
male
age
36-40,
*ohammad
writes:well!!! hi ... i hurt my wife feelings and i told her we must stop then i got regret , i feel kind of lost i was study in university and i got out of university cant continue anymore and i didnt told anybody till now i feel a shame of my self , iam syrian and my wife she romanian , she come to me in the time when i was feel very lost and she is the only one who treated my pains , now i want to tell my family about what happend to me with study but i cant iam so worry , and my wife was with me and she have one more year in university and she move to her country to finish this year , i think i treat her very good but i cant see my self in her eyes , what made me to say that to her she stay in front of the pc talking to me and cant smile to me , but someone call her alot all the time she can smile and lough with him or her and i feel bad coz i do my best for her to be happy but i cant do anything more , and she was pregnant and she was fight to make abortion , so i got agree with her she told me what the kid ll eat how he ll grow up ,and all our problem was coz i dont work and i dont have money i was think she can be patient with me but i think she lost her patient , i want to go to her country now and stay with her sometime but i dont have moeny and the visa i cant take it easy , and now i dont have anything no money no work , i feel i start lose her i must go fast to her to fix this things but i cant i want to do something for her coz iam more in love with her , and she start tell me that she ll not be with me and we wait till another time and future ll show us , she dont give me any hope , in fact i try one time to suicide but i stop i was worry what ll happen to her , but she is really now make me feel very bad and i cant imagine my self living without her , i hope to do something , i want to work but i dont find anything i try many and i keep trying , our relation very complicated and she wont make it easy i brake my pride i feel hurt but i try to joke for her and make her smile but she wont , that kill me , so what i can do ? do u can advise me , plz i feel too bad and i feel lost .
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2009): well we all go through so many problems and we say what we should not say at times . and think you are an honest guy but what i would advise is if you really love her dont give up on her keep trying and be patient im sure she will see that you really love her do apologise to her and dont stress too much . really tell her what is happening and what is really deep down your heart let her know your worries and explain to her the reason you said all those things to her it might take time but im sure she will see sense in the end just dont give up on her yet keep intouch with her if it means write emails to her evryday do and just make your feelings out with her
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2009): I am very sorry for you. You know marriage is about being with one another in good times and in bad. Right now you are going through a rough period of your life and thus your marriage is going through a bad time as well. Instead of trying to make her laugh, have you tried to talk about your feelings with her? Have you told her how you feel like a failure? That you need help to figure out what to do? Maybe she is angry with you because what you are going through is serious and you try just to make jokes with her. I know you make jokes to try and help ease the stress of the situation but it is not working. I think you need to have a serious conversation about your future with your wife. You need to be honest with her. Tell her how much she means to you, be honest about your faults, and tell her that you want to work together to find a solution to your current problem. She is your wife, not your girlfriend, so she should be motivated to work the problems you have out together with you.You will survive this. You need to believe you will survive this and you need to think strategically to counteract the problems you have. Don't quit, have faith in your marriage and in your wife, but more than anything you need to have faith in yourself!!Good luck.
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