A
female
age
51-59,
*rances2967
writes:Please help. My partner and I have been together 8 months, it's a long distance relationship and we talk and text daily and I see him every 5 weeks. During his week off he also has to see his children (2 and 4 yrs) and I am always very supportive of that, I have not met them and am not allowed to meet them as his ex says I am just a fling. The big problem is that his ex will not allow him to see the kids unless she is with him, so this means that if he wants to go to lunch, the park, or just anywhere with them then she has to go too. He has asked if he can have them for a hour and she refuses that as well, so basically he just puts up with it. His kids have never met his parents and this is now happening at xmas in another country, so him and the kids and her are all going together because she wont let him by himself. The thought of her with him at xmas drives me insane. He's seen a lawyer and told her about this and she said if he pushes it she will take the kids out of the country and make it very difficult. We are now arguing and he is getting annoyed with me because I am constantly asking him to try to sort it out, in the meantime she is now being all nice to him and ringing him daily so he can speak to his daughter, which is fine but she is up to something I think?? I'm starting to get paranoid that she wants him back and that shes going to try play happy families while they are away. I get on really well with his mum and she is asking him if im coming on holiday with him, he has said he doesnt know because his ex wont tell him what her plans are, which again drives me crazy. And now its just causing him and I to argue, which we never do and it's awful. I'm scared i'm starting to push him away now. What should I do??
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2010): You need to stop and think about what he is going through. It's obvious that you don't have children of your own. His children are and always will be more important to him than any girlfriend. This is also not about his ex. If you love this man, support him in this difficult time.
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