A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So this is kind of a silly question but I do need some logical advice on this. My boyfriend is a great guy(the majority of the time). He isn't a cheater, liar, or woman beater so...he's definitely a keeper lol.The problem is...He's a terrible cook. Well I won't say terrible because the food is edible, but its usually just...wrong. He ruined Hamburger Helper one night. Who ruins hamburger helper?! Its the easiest thing in the world to make. The problem is he's ALWAYS trying to cook for me. I honestly think he enjoys cooking and it makes him happy. The only problem is he expects me to eat it. And if I don't like it and say "Baby this isn't that good, sorry" he throws a bitch fit and gets all sensitive on me. I happen to be both an awesome cook and a picky eater. So its hard for me to pretend like I enjoy it. We also have some cultural differences so...He tends to eat/cook his food very blandly. And he thinks ketchup belongs on everything. What is a girl to do?!
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2011): Cook with him
A
male
reader, Htsn47 +, writes (14 October 2011):
 Full credit for him for trying. Do you think the problem is what he's cooking, or how he cooks it?
If it's the recipes, maybe you can plan the meals together? Or share cooking: one person makes the main dish, the other makes the sides, or some combination.
If it's skill, how about taking a class together? The tricky part might be avoiding bruising his ego, but maybe you could avoid this by making it something you do together. When I took cooking classes, there were lots of couples doing it together so I don't think it would look odd. Many classes are run in very informal, accessible and fun formats. (the classes I took were almost a dinner party where we had to make our own food.)
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A
male
reader, serenity80  +, writes (14 October 2011):
You should just be honest with him, but pass the comment in a playful and lighthearted way. Hopefully he will get the message.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (14 October 2011):
 It's nice to hear you think he's great, but him not lying, beating you or cheating on you doesn't automatically make him a keeper. That sentence struck me as a bit odd. Maybe you didn't mean for it to sound that way, but if that's your only needed qualifications then you are setting the bar pretty low. My maniac and horrible ex boyfriend didn't cheat, didn't hit me either... but come on. He did tons of other stuff. Just checking that your bare minimum is something you can actually live on, and not just survive on.
""Baby this isn't that good, sorry" he throws a bitch fit and gets all sensitive on me." For example. If he's a sulky, immature and bitchy man then I'd say you've set your standard too low. The cooking isn't the problem. The problem is how he deals with things in the relationship. How you deal with things as well of course, it takes two to tango. But if you can't tell him that "baby, your food isn't that great. I love you, but I don't like your cooking" and have a LAUGH at it together, then something isn't right. He sounds over sensitive.
Could be something you and him can work on though. But you have to be honest. Suggest you and him cook together instead. Tell him how much you appreciate and love that he cooks for you, but that you must be honest with him. His cooking ain't great, and you prefer it if you and him could make a meal together instead.
If he can't deal with that then is the communication in your relationship working at all? If this is seriously the only "problem" there is in this relationship when I suggest you just eat the food and be grateful even if it tastes bad. But it sounds more like this is an attitude problem of his and a communication problem between you and him. Solve it.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2011): Cook WITH him and work to show him what you like.
Just like being a lover...
Cook WITH him, don't boss him around, just accept that we all have different styles of cooking.
Culturally, he may be from a poor area as well, like me, and yes we ate ketchup on a lot of stuff growing up (bean soup with ketchup, crackers with ketchup, and other stuff that would make the average person vomit). We ate stuff that was terrible sometimes, and you just didn't be picky.
But, it changes with experience, and exposure to good foods over time.
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A
female
reader, Livejust2bJess +, writes (14 October 2011):
 hahaha this is a very common problem. Just cause he doesn't cook good doesn't make him a bad guy =) you two should maybe spend vauleable couple time together by cooking and preparing meals together for the both of you before going out to a movie or etc. or take cooking lessons or show him some of your techniques on how to cook =) or easy enough go out to dinner =)
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