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anonymous
writes: I have been with my partner for 7 years and we have a baby together, but I think I've fallen for someone else who could be the one. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2005): Even if its been 7 years give him/her a chance to make things better. Also you need to look at yourself. Do you do the best to make him/her want you? Coming home and falling asleep on the sofa doesn't make it. Take time to prepare yourself for the evening, being close. If you look around you'll always find better, but can you find someone that will put with your problems. Communications!!! Who ever said life was easy, It will be worth if we work together and keep faith. If you want love, give more love. If you want more of anything you have to give more! I'd rather have alot of little things all the time then one big thing. I work a full time job but still find the time to cook, clean, and help my love as much as I can. He/she doesn't always treat me the best but I'll always try to make life better the best I can. I may not make big money,live in a home, and drive the new car but he/she can depend on me!
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (19 April 2005):
 There's a reason that "The 7 Year Itch" is a famous phrase... Human relationships seem geared to go through difficult phases about every 7 years, which, if you think about it primally, is just about enough time for a couple to meet, fall madly in love, produce a baby and ensure that that baby is past the perils of toddlerhood. After that, humans seem to have trouble maintaining the spark in relationships.Not that it's impossible, but 7 years, and 14 and 21 etc are difficult times and require work to get through.What makes you think that this new light on the horizon could be "the one" (provided there is such a thing)? Is it because he/she thrills you, makes you think rude thoughts, charms you? Your partner did that once too, though, right? The new person might just be a *different* person, not a better one. Don't be too quick to give up on what you have.Consider what you have to gain by staying with your current partner and trying to get the old thrill back: no getting used to another person's bathroom habits. No having to pretend that you like playing Scrabble, just so you have a better chance at sex. No more dizzying highs and terrifying lows as you try to anticipate the other person's likes and dislikes. No trying to ingratiate yourself with grumpy in-laws... And your baby gets to grow up with its own, two loving parents, too.Before you charge off with this new potential partner, think for a good long time about everything that you and your current partner have together. Consider talking out the problems that you're experiencing now, especially if its just the sort of things that boredom with each other produces, complaints like "We never go out any more!" "You're getting fat!" and "You're only interested in that damned video game!"Put some effort into making this relationship what it used to be and you will soon get past this stage. Really.
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