A
female
age
36-40,
*ennylily
writes:I was never a wrong person but some circumstances made me commit some really silly and immature mistakes. Like forcing myself to go out on a date just cause my trust on my boyfriend was lost. I never intended or had any desire to be with any guy. I was dumb or wanted " revenge" or what ! I just didn't know how to deal with the hurt when got to know some huge lies about my bf's past and virginity. Thought I was always so loyal and he kept lying, I should wrong him too. Wasn't mature enough to understand past is e past!! I look back and feel so embarrassed and feel like even unintentionally and meaningless stupidity, I have wronged my bf with whom I've had a troubled relationship back then when i committed this dumbness but now my rel it's fine. Does some silly stupid immature mistakes make you a wrong person? Like being too naive and letting a guy kiss you without having the desire to do so. My bf knows about it and forgave me but I still feel like am i wrong person?? If I didn't had any will to do anything with any guy but was too naive and immature, does that make me a cheat?? Need advice!! Also wanna mention, no I never had sex with any guy outside my relationship.
View related questions:
immature, revenge Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (12 October 2013):
 No, it doesn't make you a "wrong" person, but an impulsive and perhaps naive and immature.
Look at those actions and think on them as learning experiences or lessons in WHAT NOT to do.
And next time you feel like doing something you KNOW isn't right, give yourself a little more time to decide if you STILL want to do it, or if you rather not.
Living with regret is not healthy. Because there is nothing you can do to change your past actions, only your current and FUTURE ones. And you do that, but THINKING before acting. That way you avoid doing things that you later beat yourself up about. TAKE responsibility for YOUR actions.
IF your BF can forgive you, then you ARE OK to forgive yourself. Let it go. Move on.
Decide what kind of person you want to be. What morals, values and ethics you want to be known for. And then, follow them.
A
female
reader, Ladyhopeful +, writes (12 October 2013):
Yes, I agree with 'Starlights'.
We have all done things we have regretted later, and we learn from our mistakes.
Your boyfriend has forgiven you, so you need to forgive yourself.
You aren't a bad person.
...............................
A
female
reader, Starlights +, writes (12 October 2013):
 Doing "silly stupid immature mistakes" as you call it DOES NOT make you a wrong/bad / evil person. This is because as humans we make mistakes, sometimes we do it so we can learn something better out of our mistakes.
Dont beat yourself up about it. Also your BF forgives you because he knows your a good hearted person.
You have to forgive yourself and not feel guilty for doing things that you didnt know better at that time.
We've all done things we are not proud of; but it does not make you a bad person, it makes you have a life experience and possibly help you grow to a person who makes better decisions next time.
Hope that helps!
...............................
A
female
reader, Miss.Cupid +, writes (12 October 2013):
 Dear pennylily, I do not believe you were wrong whats so ever. The past is the past, there is a reason we don't live there anymore!!!!. to be honest I've done things I deeply regret as well. I respect the fact that you have not had sex with any guy outside your relationship, that is something to be proud of. Us as women/ or young ladies have these tendencies to do revenge to make us feel better inside. I feel as though it was just a heat of the moment. You need to forgive yourself, and learn from the mistakes that occurred. if you live with regret everyday you'll only sink into depression. You seem young and like I stated before we make mistakes, we're only human. Forgive yourself.
...............................
|
