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anonymous
writes: When to have sex ?How many dates should I have with a man before sleeping with him? I don't want him to think I am a tart but I don't want him to think I am teasing him and leading him on. I really fancy him and want to have sex with him but want him to see me again.
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female
reader, Miss Lab +, writes (13 March 2008):
sex is something that should not be rushed into, it only makes things complicated, you have to do it when the time is right for both of you.
if you feel that the time is right then go ahead.
having sex with numeral amount of people also does not make you a slut it just makes you a very passionate person, you may like to express your feelings by using sex.
If you feel that you really like this guy and he is one who is not going to hurt you and you feel ready then you should go ahead but you have to learn to trust him with your feelings before you even start to think about sex.
if you are certain he is a gooden then you will certainly have made the right choice.
A
reader, smilechipper +, writes (13 May 2005):
Hi, I wouldn't rush into having sex with this man. If he wants you for who you, are and not just sex, he will wait for however long it takes. Obviously you're very attracted to him and this makes it hard to keep your hands off him, but wait and see how this relationship goes or you could end up feeling used.There are men out there unfortunately who are only looking for one thing - sex - then they move on to the next woman. I can see you are worried about being labeled a tart or a tease, but if you don't sleep around then you wont be labeled as a tart; as for being a tease, I think we all do a bit of teasing when we fancy a man. I think it's when men feel you are deliberately flaunting yourself and almost letting them have sex or get very very close and then suddenly saying sorry, you can't do any more, that they call you a tease.You seem to be worrying far more about him and his thoughts of you than what's right for you. It also depends on what you want from this man, be it a meaningful settling-down type of relationship or a casual thing. Maybe you need to wait until you are so sure of what's right for you that you won't need to ask anyone else's opinion. There are no rules of when the best time to have sex is, and it is hard to not do anything when you really feel sexy and in the mood, but try not to give into the urge if the next day you'll wish youd never done it! Be careful, and you don't need me to tell you to remember to use contraception!
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A
female
reader, Wendyg +, writes (23 April 2005):
There is no set rule to when you should have sex. It depends on how relaxed you are with someone and if you can see it developing into a relationship. I think we have all had sex with someone to early on and regretted it! It all depends how the two of you are together, there shouldnt be any pressure to have sex with anyone, if it doesnt feel right dont do it. Dont have sex with him just because you think he will move on, do it because you want to and you feel there is a relationship possibly between the two of you. If is the right man, and you have fun and get on then he will not have problems waiting. If hes the type that unless you sleep with him he wont hang around then hes not worth it. Any man that really wants to be with you will have no problem waiting for sex. Do whats right for you, not what you think he wants. Be natural together and see what happens. Dont be pressured into keeping a man by having sex with him. Have fun and see where it leads.
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