A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: ok so i have a son from a previous 4 year relationship. My son's dad and i are no longer together but he has regular contact with my son and we are both on good terms. He has now asked me to have another baby with him. I was completely thrown by the suggestion but have found myself giving it some serious thought. I would like another child and it would be nice for the children to have the same dad. My ex knows that i don't want to be with him but i'm not sure how having a baby would affect him. Any advice?
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female
reader, followtheblackrabbit +, writes (28 September 2010):
I'm not sure this is a good idea. A baby should be born to parents in a strong relationship. It's nice that you two get along and that he's still involved in your son's life yet, having another child with him can prove to be quite challenging. Sex will happen in order to have a baby. Sex is a very intimate act and no matter what, emotions come into play. In addition, because you both are trying for a baby, more emotion is involved. In order to get you pregnant, you two might have sex regularly. This might ressurect old feelings and bring about a lot of confusion when you don't want that. He might even have suggested this to get close to you again. But, if you truly want this, make sure you're financially ready. Make sure you can handle the emotional repercutions. And remember that in your age group, the more children you have, the less shots you have at finding an accepting man. Even men with their own children are reluctant to care for others. But, of course, there's an exception in every group :)
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