A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Last June my best friend got married. As bestman i escorted the Brides cousin down the isle. During the rehearsal and wedding we had so much fun. we just clicked. We spent all last summer together. weather we were talking on the phone or going out to eat or whatever. we were together. I started getting strong feelings for this woman. We never became more than friends even though we had slept together. She knew that i had feelings for her but she wanted to just be friends and see where things would go from there. I was ok with this because i knew that she had just got out of a bad relationship about the time that i came along. Then, on my 'Birthday' she took me out and later that night while we were lying in the bed, she asked me if i would be hurt if she got back with her ex. I told her that yeah i would be hurt and that i did care for her, but if she felt that she needed see him again then i guess i couldnt stop her. we'll she's been seeing him again and i am absolutely crushed. I think the one thing that bothered her the most was the fact that i am 21 and she is 30. The whole time i was with her it never once bothered me that she was 10 years older than me. Should that have bothered me? What am i suppose to do? am i suppose to wait for her, or do i just say the heck with it and move on. Its like one min i say the hell with it, and the next I just miss her so much. Last summer was the best summer of my life. I just dont know what to do....
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best friend, cousin, crush, escort, her ex, move on, wedding Reply to this Question
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male
reader, tux +, writes (28 February 2009):
 Sometimes, you need to move on, because if you linger around too long you'll vanish and lead a sad, lonely life. She has moved on, you should too. Maybe she'll come back, but maybe she won't and if she won't and you move on... you don't have to regret waiting for something that was not going to happen.
A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (28 February 2009):
 I say forget her. It sounds like she never took your feelings into serious consideration, and that's just not cool. If she just wanted a fling then she should have been very clear about that BEFORE she slept with you.
You're better off. And age can sometimes present problems in a relationship, but if it didn't bother you at the time, then I don't thin it should. Only you know how you feel about an age difference.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2009): "Should that have bothered me?" - Yes, because you're asking it.
"What am i suppose to do?" - Do whatever you want. If you want to wait, then wait. If you want to pass, then pass. Strangers can't tell you what you should do based on how you feel. Strangers can offer you an opinion based on THEIR personality coinciding with a situation like yours. Alas, what if I said, "Screw her and leave"? Will you seriously leave her? What if another Uncle or Aunt gave you a long winded answer and then say, "Wait for her! Love is eternal!" Will you really stay and wait for her forever?
Go for whatever your heart and your mind tells you to.
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