A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am a Female on a friends account A couple of my friends and I were talking about our previous sexual encounters. I was always raised with morals and told to wait until marriage. I am 22 years of age now. I have never had oral sex, anal sex, and I messed up and had vaginal intercourse for a minute if that and told the man to stop when I was about 18 years of age. That is the only sexual experience that I have ever had. Will a guy still marry me? My other friends have racked up many partners, I dont even consider the man a partner he wore a condom to and it was only for a minute and told I him to stop. I know that it was wrong, but I just don't want a man to not marry because of one mistake. I am getting ready to graduate from college as well. I plan on not doing anything sexual until I am married. My question is what do you guys think of my resume and would you be disappointed in me? What if you guys were virgins would you not want to marry me because of this?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2011): If you want someone to reassure you and say only shitty guys would judge you for what you briefly did . . . sorry, I will not do that. You may not have done much but you are definitely not a virgin anymore. You need STD testing now, like it or not.
IMO it does not make a guy shitty if that act matters to him, it just means he still holds the exact same values that you probably held right up until you did what you did. No point in turning around and trying to bash your own belief system now.
But I will tell you that you are still VERY, VERY NEARLY a virgin. You are miles and miles away from a promiscuous woman and you should not just throw up your hands and feel "dirty" and start sleeping with guys from now on. I would love to ideally marry a virgin woman myself but I would sure as hell rather have you than one who slept with numerous people. You have done a lot of holding out and you still have an almost perfect record, don't throw it all away now.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2011): I hate to be crude, but...You don't marry a woman's vagina unless you are an asshole.You marry the person.Be the best person you can be, and remember that virgins can be jerks just like women who've had 300 partners, and women who have had 300 partners can be wonderful people just like women who have had none.Personally, I've had 3 sexual partners in my life, my wife has had many, many, many more. I came from a stable home, my wife came from a very unstable and chaotic one. Yeah, it caused us some struggles, but I'd not change my mind because of the person.If I had to do it over again, I'd marry her...and nobody else.Why?Because she is a great person.Would I marry a 29 year old virgin...no...I'd want to make sure that she wanted sex and liked it, because marriage without sex is hell and I've known people who lived that way.Sort of like the old joke about the martyr's death in Islam, he dies, goes to heaven and gets his reward of 70 virgins. Then finds out that they won't have sex with him because they want to remain virgins.
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