A
female
age
36-40,
*uffy76
writes:Okay, i'm not really used to girs being all flirty because my previous relationships didn't have any sort of problems with girls. But this relationship i'm in now all we seem to fight about is this topic. He says "you never want me to talk to any girl, you want me all for yourself, im not that kind of guy "i'm friendly" and dont want to hurt anyones feelings. When we first started dating, there was this other girl he was after claiming shes his best friend whoch i didnt buy, she didnt want to date him when we finally started becomming exclusive she wouldnt back off and started telling him she loved him.. shes attractive and i know he was really interested.. i would never say anything in the beginning when he used to talk to her or meet up with her but then it got on my nerves kuz he would tell me to back off some guys. There have been a lot of girls that arent friends with either of us but they wouldnt try to get to know me they'd go straight to my boyfriend start getting all touchy and all over him. He really IS a nice guy, everyone loves him, he doesnt know how to put up limits with certain girls though.. the ones that act toooo all over him. I know i get a little jealous but only because WE dont even act like that, so i feel so annoyed when he starts acting all flirty with other girls.. or to him hes being normal. I tried telling him more than once but his response is always "you have to be more confident. Why are you insecure?" It really upsets me he says that he'll never let any girl break the boundary he thinks is too much. I told him im not gonna wait for anyone to do that. Theres one girl now that basically screams when she sees him. Always is so touchy. Whenever were at the gym she ONLY praises him and cheers for him. In any group conversation she eyes him. She laughs super hard at his jokes like rolling on the floor laughter.. and then sometimes she even looks at me to see my reaction. I KNOW shes not good news and when i was taking a pic with my bf she tapped his arm and said "enough i get jealous"!!!! I dont know what to do kuz i already talked to him more than once about it. Tried telling him everything.. i even asked for a break up (over many other things as well) I know he loves me more than anything and all these girls dont mean shit.Im not talkin about HIM as much as im talkin about HOW TO GET RID OF HER!i told him she annoys the hell out of me and i think it made him notice even more.. i catch him looking at her seeing if shes laughing or not always tryin to make her laugh and it upsets me. I havent brought it up ever since we last fought but i dont know if i should talk to him about it or try indirectly throwing comments at the girl. Thing is all this happens and i just smile and play along but i cant do that anymore. I asked him to avoid her he says hes not comfortable avoiding people and that he does like the attention. And i dont even KNOW her and she doesnt know him and he doesnt know her. I dont feel jealous but i feel so disrespected. From both sides. And he says were bigger than that.. that these arent the things we should fight about. Help
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female
reader, Songwr1ter  +, writes (28 December 2015):
I don't think he's disrespecting you .. He just sounds like a genuine guy ..
I think, try talking to him one moore time, don't shout and scream and fight, just handle the situation calmly....
You say that these girls are all over him, so why not throw it back in their faces??
What I mean is, if a girl starts flirting with him, flirt with him even more. If she starts touching him, go ahead, and kiss him. CLAIM him!! Show them girls that he's YOURS!
When she cheers him on, you, cheer even louder!
Don't be ashamed to show him affection publicaally, and as I said, CLAIM HIM, GIRL!!!
Good luck! Hope everything works out for you!
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