A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been going out with my boyfriend nearly ten months. And everything is perfect. He's so loving and we have up to now not had one argument or anything. When me and my friends get together and have boy talks, i always say how much i trust him and i love him so much! I have never been jealous of other girls around him, he's really friendly and girls who use to go to school with him or old friends always give him a friendly hug and have a little chat to him whenever they see him, and i never feel any jealousy towards that because im the same. I just feel so lucky to have found someone as good as him. So anyway the other night, we went to a friends party had a really good time, and decided to hit the night club when it got really late. I was the only girl with him and about 4 of his friends in the nightclub. They were all having a mess around dancing stupidly and i was dancing at the side. Then this girl around about the age of my boyfriend went up to him and at first was laughing and looked to be joking around with him. ( i couldnt hear what they were saying because of the music). Then she seemed to get really close to him and had her hands all over him, i mean not like a friendly hug or anything, she was really close and whispering in his ear. So i glanced away because i thought i was being stupid and i didn't want him to think i was watching over him. All his friends were watching this girl talking to him and they all looked a bit sheepish, one of his friends greg looked at him, then looked straight at me just as i glanced away so he must have thought i hadnt seen them, so he came and grabbed me and started dancing really stupidly blocking my view of my boyfriend and the girl. So i couldnt see what they were doing, all i know is once she had walked away greg stopped dancing, looked at my boyfriend and shook his head and with his mouth did i sigh of relief. Deep down i just think something isn't right here, and that greg was covering for my boyfriend and distracting me from seeing something i shouldnt. All night i felt sick thinking about it. My boyfriend was the same lovey dovey over me, but i tried to ignore him and give him the cold shoulder whilst we were still in the night club, whilst we were stood at the bar, he got his phone out and i noticed it said 'emily calling' (ive seen this name pop up in his inbox before but they're just school friends) the odd thing was he rejected the call and put it back into his pocket, thinking i hadnt seen. i couldnt stay mad with him for too long because he was just acting completely normal, and i have never had these doubts about him before so we went home like everything was normal.Its just i cant stop thinking about it and it is making me feel sick. I love him so much and i would never cheat on him and thought the same of him. am i being pathetic and being jealous or do you think theres something going off? please help!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Injeopardy  +, writes (8 July 2009):
Something like that would bother me quite a bit. Find a time to sit down alone with him and explain to him your concerns. Just tell him you want to clear up the confusion you're having. Let him know what's bothering you and explain to him that you trust him and love him, but he needs to be honest with you about this girl at the club.
If he won't tell you anything or acts weird, I'd be suspicious. It's hard to tell what was up, but good luck!
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