A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:First of all, the age is wrong, I'm only 17.I've been friends with this guy for ages and for the past year I've been pretty much in love with him, lets call him Chris. I recently was at a party and I think I was a bit all over him. I REALLY wanted to get with him and I was discussing it with one of my guy friends, who shall be known as Mathew, who was saying that Chris seemed to be pretty into me and that Chris was acting around me the way that Mathew would be too shy to with any girl he liked.I really can't say what, he wasn't able to explain to me what chris was doing.Anyway, at some point chris and I ended up doing EVERYTHING in the bedroom.Afterwards, he said to me not to tell people what happend as he had been in a similar situation before and didn't want the same scandal.The next day he was sending me texts telling me not to say it to anyone. I was a bit torn by what he was saying because he went on to say how he is already under much stress from being in his last year of school and didn't want to deal with rumours or a complicated friendship/relationship and he seemed very apologetic about it, which all sounds fair enough but I felt really rejected and one of my friends -who, in fairness, dosen't actually know him or what our relationship has been like - said that it sounded like he was using me.I don't know how I should feel, or how to deal with this situation.What do you think? Could he just have wanted to get his bit or could he actually like me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionalso, as far as the not finding me attractive bit - I even overheard people from the next room while we were in bed talking about us and saying that he was SO going to do me cause I was hot. I felt very complimented :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell the thing is that when he only made out with a girl it became a HUGE scandal and caused loads of fights, also, he is a really really good friend of mine and I can't see him just using me.
I don't know if I'm humoring myself although both the statements above are completely true and could be actual reasons for not telling people.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010): Sorry for the double post my connection dropped.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010): Yeah I'm afraid your friend is right, I don't want to sound blunt but the only reasons a guy wants to keep who he slept with a secret is if he already has a girlfriend or he doesn't find the girl attractive.
Trust me most guys your age are quite boastful of their sexual conquests except for the reasons above.
I really hate to put it like that but that's as nice as I can say it, he used you, full stop. The reasons he stated are the obvious clue. I have never minded nor do I know any guy who has ever minded people knowing he slept with a girl he finds attractive when he is single. That's not exactly a negative rumour.
If he didn't want the stress and complication then why did he sleep with you? That's right, he used you for some no strings fun 'he got his, now be a good girl and don't tell anyone' the guy is a p***k. I'd tell anyone who was willing to listen and I'd tell them he was crap, small, came too quickly, couldn't keep it hard and doesn't know how to satisfy a woman, but that's just me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010): Yeah I'm afraid your friend is right, I don't want to sound blunt but the only reasons a guy wants to keep who he slept with a secret is if he already has a girlfriend or he doesn't find the girl attractive.
Trust me most guys your age are quite boastful of their sexual conquests except for the reasons above.
I really hate to put it like that but that's as nice as I can say it, he used you, full stop. The reasons he stated are the obvious clue. I have never minded nor do I know any guy who has ever minded people knowing he slept with a girl he finds attractive when he is single. That's not exactly a negative rumour.
If he didn't want the stress and complication then why did he sleep with you? That's right, he used you for some no strings fun 'he got his, now be a good girl and don't tell anyone' the guy is a p***k. I'd tell anyone who was willing to listen and I'd tell them he was crap, small, came too quickly, couldn't keep it hard and doesn't know how to satisfy a woman, but that's just me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010): if he is telling you not to say anything to anyone and says how he doesn't want to be with anyone, he's just looking to get laid. guys are pigs.
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