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female
,
*aramel
writes: How do I get him??? We started talking on a dating site and agreed that we would just meet casually because we were both mutually attracted to each other on a physical level. Well, we met and the night was amazing. He turned out to be an even better person face to face than on the net. We laughed and chatted and shared a bit about ourselves.... truth be told, I can't remember when I felt SO relaxed and comfortable with a man the way I did with him that night. We had sex, and that was all it was ever meant to be, but in that short space of time I felt a connection I cannot describe. Yes, it probably is early days yet - and one night should not be the decider... but I can't deny that I want to know this man - more than for a one night stand, I want to explore his mind and get to learn 'him'! How did my head/heart get involved in this even though the communication was clear from the outset that the meeting was going to be purely physical? Why must he HAVE to have turned out to be everything that I have been praying for??????
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, uonlyliveonce  +, writes (5 July 2006):
 its such a shame us woman have to bring emotion in to sex even when we dont mean to, men just dont work the same as us and sex is just that nothing more
id say all you can do is wait and see whhat he has 2 say and if he contacts you dont tell him how you feel coz honestly im sure he would run a mile if you told him unless he feels the same theres not much you can do i know its not what you want 2 hear but it sounds like he's just using you, which to be fair was what you agreed too.
you offer casual sex to a man and he's gonna take it you cant expect him to want anything more
A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (4 July 2006):
 Maybe the reason you felt so comfortable around him was the fact that emotions did not play a part.
It seems like you have fallen for this guy because of the way you connected with such ease.
I fear that this guy was only interested in sex and has probably not even given it a second thought since.
Relationships should really be about friendship and trust, rather than based around sex.
Having said that, I do know people who got to know each other after a one night stand. They have gone on to have a serious relationship together, so it can work.
Have you tried contacting him since?
Best of luck with this one hun.
Keep me informed please.
Dave
xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2006): It sounds great that you have found someone you feel you can connect with, however because you want to move the goal posts from the original arrangement and get this man you have to go about it the right way.
Don't bombard him with messages about how you feel; as yet he doesn't know that you want more than you did previously and my advice is don't tell him - yet. It may scare him off as he might not be prepared to commit to a realtionship at this early stage. In addition, he may have other responsibilities. The best thing to do is send him a message saying thanks for a lovely time and leave it at that. If he feels a similar connection he wil most certainly get in touch and ask to see you again.
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