A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:A while ago I found out my girlfriend kissed another guy at a party, she didn't tell me about this, I found out through a friend. She said he kissed her and she didn't kiss him. I'm finding it hard to believe because she didn't tell me about this, I found out, it's as if she was hiding something from me. Anyway my problem is whenever she talks about another guy... for example she came home from work and talked about 4/5 guys she talked to at work... I became very jealous (something I shouldn't have done). I think back to the kiss she had (which was described as being her leaning into kiss him to say thank you and he kissed her full on the lips... sounds a bit sketchy) This has made me jealous for no reason at all, I have thoughts that she could "kiss" someone again or they could "kiss" her. I know its only a kiss as some of you will say. I think it boils down to her being able to keep something like that from me.I don't want to feel jealous! Can anyone help?
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male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (28 July 2007):
 I agree that its probably as much the non-disclosure as the kiss because although you may not admit it you are probably wondering what else she can keep from you now. Having said that things may well be exactly as she describes them and her intent in not telling you may have been relatively innocent but her good intentions have had the opposite effect.
I'm not sure there is an easy answer to this to be honest because what you have to do is learn to trust her again.It may have been only a small violation of that trust but nonetheless it has unsettled you and if you both dont start working on rebuilding that trust then it could effect the relationship way beyond what it actually is so to speak.
I think the only thing I can really suggest is that you try to clear the air with a full and frank discussion and go from there. Hope that helps.
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