A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear aunt agony ,Last year I chaned my dentist. He is cute and I instantly fell for him . I lost my sleep and apetite , it has been a year now but whenever I see him I get jitters in my knees. Since he is my neighbor , I know he is married. Also, I came to know that he has an affair with lady from another race for last 6 years. wheenver he sees me ( in the neighborhood) or in gathering , he gives lot of attention to me (atleast I noticed so). I have be-friended his wife so that I can resist his charm . But nothng seems to be working. The more I think abt him , his affair etc, more perplexed I am . Shall I express him my feelings - how ? How will he react , what if he rejects outrightly , what if he tells his wife - that will be so much of bad publicity for me in the neighborhood. How shall I control my feelings for him ?Please hlp me !!
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male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (3 June 2009):
 Are you serious? How old are you again? Have you been reading those Harlequin Novels again between watching "Maury" and "Jerry Springer"?You control your feelings for him by acting like an adult, and keeping your libido in check and your mouth and legs shut. You are playing with fire by your justification. You really think this is drama ripped right out of a romance novel? Just do yourself a favor and lust after a single man instead of a married one. Don't take this low drama any farther.
A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (3 June 2009):
 It is ok to have a crush on your married dentist, not ok to act on it. It suggests you have self esteem issues if you are willing to settle for a fling with a married man when there are plenty of single men out there. If you think root canal is painful, that is nothing compared to being stuck in a dodgy affair with your dentist. His conduct is very unprofessional to be honest - if you are is patient then he should be dealing with your teeth, not your libido.
If he had an affair in the past, he will again perhaps. I feel sorry for his wife, especially if she doesn't know what she is married to. Make sure you are friends with her because you like the woman, not to get close to him. Get another dentist and stay away from this man.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 June 2009):
 Well your dentist might be hot, but he is a slut. OK? Think of him as a male fantasy and that is it. Do not ( unless you want a LOT of drama and heartache) take this any further - NOTHING good can come from this.
You have befriended his wife? You want the be the one causing HER pain? I know he is the one married to her but I do think EVERY mistress who KNOW the guy is married have a part in the "blame".
Pull yourself together and realize that he is 1. married, 2. off-limits, 3. a cheater.
Ignore his affair it's none of your business. And as far as what race his "lover" has, that should be none of your business too. It really don't matter.
Go forth and find a single and available man you don't have to share. Who isn't a he-whore.
Good luck,
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2009): Well, he's already having an affair and I'm assuming his wife doesn't know about that, either. This guy is a player and honestly, I feel the worst for his wife. And you should definitely know better than to think anything good would come out of you confessing your feelings to him. This man is pathetic and outright disgusting and I sincerely hope he and the woman he's having an affair with, get caught. I mean, six years? Either his wife is completely stupid, knows about it and is trying her damnest to deny it, or just doesn't give a shit. Do NOT tell him how you feel. It'll only make things worse.
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