A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Is anyone else out there in the same boat as me?I'm 26, living at home, changed career so not on a great wage (less than £20k a year). I don't have much to complain about tbh, I have my health, good friends and a brilliant family.But recently my boyfriend and I broke up. We had plans to move out together etc, and now obviously that's all gone, I can't afford to move out on my own so I'm saving up at the moment. It feels like I will be living at home forever though as stupidly I have a large loan I'm paying off, so I can only save between £300-£400 a month.I guess it's hard for me as I'm the only one of my friends in this situation, most of them are married with kids, mortgages or renting places.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2009): Hi I am a 29 year old female and have never moved out of home, although ideally would of liked to from my mid twenties. Been saving up what I can over the years and studying for a vocational career that only just started to work in, which is very fulfilling but not highly paid. I have a on/off boyfriend with his own issues and not much money, that has made it hard for us to get it together to get a place together also.I too have my health and a loving family and some good friends, although many are more busy these days with demanding jobs and their own families etc, so don't see them as much as I would like to. I don't think we are alone, but I empathise with you as it is hard when it seems all your friends have their own pads and you don't know when it will happen for you! I have one good friend who has been unwell for years and so lives at home still and I appreciate it must be a lot harder for her then me, dealing with illness longterm when you are young, but I think it is natural to want your own place and independence. I think years ago people married younger on the whole and relationships had more commitment so was less break ups in peoples 20s, which have added to making it difficult these days for some people to acheive independence. I supose we all have more choices these days, which is good in some ways, but can make milestones take longer to achieve sometimes! Don't give up hope it will happen one day and we will really appreciate it!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm not neccessarily down in the dumps and do feel positive about things, I'm working hard to get a promotion at work and like I say I can't really complain, I guess I just feel a bit jealous when I see my friends in their nice houses with their husbands coming home to them every night...But I do enjoy the single life and I am enjoying not being tied down right now (ie mortgage kids etc), just fancied chatting to other people who are like me right now, rather than all my married/mortgaged friends :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2009): Yeah I'm down in the dumps too. 28, single (which I don't actually mind), living at home AGAIN for the first time in 10 years blah blah blah, the list goes on for days. Sympathy is nice and it certainly makes people feel better to know that they are not alone. However, its best to think positive and surround yourself with positive people who DON'T have problems. Its best to hear positive stories rather than "in the same boat" stories. That will inspire you get you ahead and out of this rut.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2009): You are doing the right thing and fortunate enought to have a great family to back you up. Don't compare yourself with your friends who may seem to have advanced in their lives, remember they also have many responsibilities that many families also stress about.
Also remeber that many people who do get married with children get divorce because of this stress. You are still young so do it right the first time, That way you don't have to start all over again when you are in your forties.
Good Luck
Tony
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