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Will our marriage survive or should I leave?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Family, Marriage problems<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 December 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 13 December 2010)
A female United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

My husband is 44 and I 33 he has 2 kids from a previous marriage 20 and 25 of age. I have 3 children with him 14,13 and 7. I lost the first one, my husband was unfaithful and that produced 2 more kids in which one the results are not back yet we have been married for 13 years. my husband was in Iraq for 11 months, I suspect that he was having an affair what should I do? now I admit that I spent a lot of the deployment money. Will our marriage survive or should I leave?

View related questions: affair, money

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

You should look into your heart ask yourself what did I bring to the table besides three children are you happy with were you are career wise are u satisfied with your parenting skills do u constantly ask or demand things of your husband or do u meet him half way or do constantly remind him that you're the boss remember the golden rule and whatever u do becomes a cycle that becaomes a generational curse that's hard to break fix it or leave emotional stress will kill your chance to move forward. And his for that matter those children were here before you were respect and go on leave the attitude behind what did the chilren do to you ask your self grow up please

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

This clearly starts with your maturity in christ and the ability to support , love and forgive once this is accomplished on your end then you will be able to fullfill your role as the help met . Y ou need to look into your heart ask yourself is this all about me and my pain ask have I punished him in which you should not because you're not GOD as he has flaws so do you it wont be repaired on a single level but it takes the work of two but if you are unevenly yoked it wont work the more disdanement or discontentment is shown towards your husband you will forever be unhappy and bitter because of previous things that's notwilling to forgive him for; your fight forgiveness is what you need to work on it is not for you but the other person GOD's got it under controll stop it's really childish of you to keep bring up the past that's what makes him do what he does and you are no better because you are physically eating away at his flesh and manhood check yourself.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

yes, there was an affair not once but two previous times that's where after being married to the second wife for a short time the second wife had the first baby which 14 the other child is also 14 and the third child is 7 and the undetermined is 8

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010):

first of all, it doesn't sound like you know for sure he even was unfaithful, but even if he was, you have to decide for yourself if the marriage is worth saving - in any case, i would advise making any decision rashly or in a rush, cause plenty of things that seem like dealbreakers today might look different in a day or thirty, so just take it slow, that's all i can suggest, other than to consider seeing a counselor to help you work thru some of the things you are feeling and thinking. good luck.

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