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I don't think I want to keep a tennis buddy who doesn't trust me with her phone number

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 April 2012) 4 Answers - (Newest, 4 April 2012)
A male United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

I met this woman in a tennis class about 6 months ago. We've been playing tennis on and off since then. We exchanged e-mail addresses, and I e-mailed her my cell phone # but she didn't give me hers.

Recently she stood me up for a tennis game, and then later e-mailed to apologize.

I'm annoyed that she still hasn't given me her phone # (she said in her e-mail that she didn't have my #) and also that she didn't give a concrete reason why she couldn't make it.

Am I being too tough on her? I don't think I want to keep a tennis buddy who doesn't trust me with her phone #.

On the other hand I don't want to get the reputation for being a jerk.

Thanks!

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (4 April 2012):

tennisstar88 agony auntAre you trying to take this tennis buddy matchup to a personal level??

I mean, email is a way of contacting you so she doesn't necessarily have to give out her number if she doesn't wish to do so. Then again, this is just strictly playing tennis so I don't see why she wouldn't give you the fastest way to get a hold of her.

Personally, I'd drop it..It's not that big of a deal and it's just a playful tennis match.I'd keep her as a tennis mate , but add some more mates. Give doubles a shot. I find it boring to play against the same person every time.

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A female reader, JayBlushes United States +, writes (3 April 2012):

I recommend you find a new tennis partner , this partner has something there hiding by not telling you the full story. If she considered you a friend after playing this much , than the Least she can do is explain . Something about her just seems weird . I understand why you would find it wrong. And for her to deny you her number and say he never got the email with your number that's all wrong. I honestly think that's too shady in a way there's something you don't no and for your own safety you should find another partner , you don't know what else she's hiding !

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A male reader, grymsoul United States +, writes (3 April 2012):

grymsoul agony auntWhy is it so important for you to have her number? It doesn't seem like a big deal that she refused to hand hers over to you. Maybe she has a past of men abusing the privilege of having her number. Maybe she now thinks you're trying to make a move on her. . .and by the way you're stressing the situation, I'm inclined to say that you are.

To be honest, if she happened to read this little post of yours, I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't want to be your tennis buddy anymore. She would probably think you were overly pestering. Just leave the number issue alone and enjoy tennis together. If and when she's ready, I'm sure she'll let you know her number.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (3 April 2012):

Honeypie agony auntFind a new tennis buddy.

Maybe it's not YOU she doesn't trust but herself. Have you thought of that? If she doesn't talk to you much outside of the tennis courts, there isn't a chance of emotional involvement, or maybe she doesn't want her husband to think she is doing something besides playing tennis.

Either way, I would find a new tennis partner.

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