A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My ex did some hurtful things leading upto the break up and more so after. We were both immature and perhaps both had depression back then.A couple years later she apologized for how she treated me and I snapped and went on a rant, it honestly triggered an almost trauma for me. I said some very targeted things about her insecurities.I miss her as a person, at the time she was my best friend but her behaviour was inexcusable and I regret how I allowed her to get me. She would pick fights and I would try remove myself before I snap.I have tried to send a msg asking how she is doing many years later but she left my last msg unread. I know before this msg she has been hit and miss with. Block and unblock over the years. Im sure i caused her pain with what I said all those years ago.I know this sounds bad but should I say sorry even if I am not? Should I say sorry even if I am pushed to breaking point? I do regret allowing her to get to me.I usually say sorry when I mess up but in this instance I feel like I did the best I could and therefore not sorry although I did do the wrong thing.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2024): It's a shame you couldn't accept her apology without a rant as it was good of her to say sorry. Don't say sorry to her if you don't mean it. You seem to be dwelling on things years later. Saying you allowed her to get to you somehow places blame on her. I think you might benefit from some counselling. GP can refer you if you want to go down that route.
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