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Dear Cupid > Forums > Cupid's Lounge > New game thread!

New game thread!

Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

Haiku?

Posted on 30 September 2011 @ 20:14 (London time) - permalink
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C. Grant, posted over a year ago

Hai Tisha-san. I took my shot at it on the old thread, you want to start us off on this one?

Posted on 30 September 2011 @ 21:36 (London time) - permalink
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DenimandLace44, posted over a year ago

There must be someone here

With eloquent words

___ ___ ___

Posted on 1 October 2011 @ 7:28 (London time) - permalink
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C. Grant, posted over a year ago

stress, anguish; ameliorated.

Posted on 1 October 2011 @ 23:11 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

Gesundheit Tish

Posted on 3 October 2011 @ 14:53 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

Tissue? I barely know you!

Posted on 4 October 2011 @ 4:44 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

Posted on 4 October 2011 @ 21:28 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

An old woman was sipping on a glass of wine, while sitting on the porch with her husband, and she said "I love you so much, I don't know how I could ever live without you." Her husband asked "Is that you, or the wine talking?"

She said....

Posted on 6 October 2011 @ 2:33 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

And Eyes? Yours made me laugh out loud!!! Ha!

Posted on 6 October 2011 @ 2:34 (London time) - permalink
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C. Grant, posted over a year ago

She said "It's me, talking to the wine"

Which all old married people will know. ;)

Posted on 6 October 2011 @ 3:7 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

Bing bing! We have a winner!

Posted on 6 October 2011 @ 5:12 (London time) - permalink
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C. Grant, posted over a year ago

I was taking a shower when my 2-year-old son came into the bathroom and wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he made a mess, he looked adorable, so I ran for my camera and took a few shots. They came out so well that I had copies made and included one with each of our Christmas cards. Days later, a relative called about the picture, laughing hysterically, and suggesting I take a closer look. Puzzled, I stared at the photo and was shocked to discover that in addition to my son, I had captured my reflection in the mirror - wearing nothing but a camera!

Posted on 6 October 2011 @ 5:52 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

Adult Truths

1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

23. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important....... Quit Laughing.

Posted on 6 October 2011 @ 13:46 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

She was the apple of his eye and he liked to sit down be cider.

Posted on 10 October 2011 @ 14:13 (London time) - permalink
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C. Grant, posted over a year ago

An old Italian gentleman lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

Dear Vincent, I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days. Love, Papa

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

Dear Papa, Don’t dig up that garden. That’ s where the bodies are buried. Love, Vinnie

At 4 a.m. The next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Papa, Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances. Love you, Vinnie

Posted on 10 October 2011 @ 16:11 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

CG, did you really send out that picture? That's hysterical! Ha!

Eyes, I love the adult truths. Great list. And i adore puns.

And now, my small offering:

(Sung to the tune of "Show me the way to go home")

Indicate the way to my abode,

I'm fatigued and wish to retire.

I imbibed some alcohol sixty minutes ago

And it went right to my cerebellum.

Wherever I may perambulate,

Over terra firma, aqua, or oceanic vapors,

You will always hear me crooning this tune,

Indicate the way to my abode.

Posted on 11 October 2011 @ 22:53 (London time) - permalink
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C. Grant, posted over a year ago

No, Tisha, that story came from elsewhere (Thank God!)

I have to think if you could sing those lyrics you didn't really consume enough alcohol. ;)

Posted on 11 October 2011 @ 23:31 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

50 Ways To Love Your Liver

Original Song: "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover"

The problem is all inside your head, mom said to me

'Cause liver is tasty as a piece of meat can be

I know that if you try it once then you will see

There must be fifty ways to love your liver

She said you really need to eat more healthy food

Furthermore, I think your comment that it's crap is just plain rude

So you keep sitting there

'Til the time that you conclude

There must be fifty ways to love your liver

Fifty ways to love your liver

You just spread on the sauce, Ross

Put it on bread, Ned

And just shovel it in, Flynn

I'm sure you'll agree

Gulp it or chew, Stu

But just get it into you

You'll think that it's great, Nate

That's my guarantee

You just shake on the salt, Walt

Try it with rice, Brice

It's much better than Spam, Sam

So stop the debate

Don't say it's bad, Brad

You're just gonna make dad mad

You're here 'til it's gone, Don

So clean off your plate

I said the look of it just makes me want to heave

I wish there was something I could say to get you to believe

That I don't appreciate this

You're trying to deceive

About the fifty ways

She said don't be like that, just try a single bite

And I believe as you're chewing you'll conclude that I am right

I was trapped there, so I tried it and then smiled with delight

There must be fifty ways to love your liver

Fifty ways to love your liver

This stuff is da bomb, mom

Better than pie, Di

I guess I'm eating crow, Flo

'Cause this is the best

This is a hit, Britt

So I'm gonna admit it

It's more than ok, May

I'm really impressed

OK, now she's gone, Dawn

This is the truth, Ruth

Gonna need me a pail, Gail

'Cause I'm gonna spew

I'm turning blue, Sue

'Cause this stuff tastes like doo doo

I'll throw it away, Faye

And tell her I'm through

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Posted on 12 October 2011 @ 13:53 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

Deep-fried crickets, anyone? ::urp::

Posted on 20 October 2011 @ 4:5 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

definitely hearing the chirps

Posted on 21 October 2011 @ 19:19 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

Romance Novel, Updated.... 2011 Version

He grasped me firmly, but gently, just above my elbow and guided me into a room, his room.

Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone.

He approached me soundlessly, from behind, and spoke in a low, reassuring voice close to my ear.

"Just relax."

Without warning, he reached down and I felt his strong, calloused hands start at my ankles, gently probing, and moving upward along my calves, slowly but steadily. My breath caught in my throat.

I knew I should be afraid, but somehow I didn't care. His touch was so experienced, so sure.

When his hands moved up onto my thighs, I gave a slight shudder, and partly closed my eyes.

My pulse was pounding. I felt his knowing fingers caress my abdomen, my ribcage.

And then, as he cupped my firm, full breasts in his hands, I inhaled sharply.

Probing, searching, knowing what he wanted, he brought his hands to my shoulders, slid them down my tingling spine to my panties.

Although I knew nothing about this man, I felt oddly trusting and expectant.

This is a man, I thought. A man used to taking charge. A man not used to taking 'No' for an answer. A man who would tell me what he wanted. A man who would look into my soul and say . . . ..

"Okay ma'am, you can board your flight now."

Posted on 21 October 2011 @ 19:23 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

Eyes, eyes, eyes. Where's the coffee warning?? You had me going there... *fans self*

Posted on 21 October 2011 @ 21:48 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

Relax Tish it's just a hot flash, it will pass, I've had a gazillion of them.

Posted on 23 October 2011 @ 2:49 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

Relax Tish it's just a hot flash, it will pass, I've had a gazillion of them.

Posted on 23 October 2011 @ 2:49 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

my laptop has the hiccups please forgive the little bastard

Posted on 23 October 2011 @ 2:49 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

Of course I am watching football and having alittle sctoch or is that scotach, scoach?

Posted on 23 October 2011 @ 3:29 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Scotch, scotch, scotch, I love scotch.~ Ron Burgundy of Anchorman

Posted on 16 November 2011 @ 19:52 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

Is that how you scotch a rumor?

Posted on 18 November 2011 @ 12:40 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

ah ha. hahah. *wipes tears* Aide Moi! ;)

Cool usage- Punny!

Posted on 18 November 2011 @ 16:13 (London time) - permalink
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eyeswideopen, posted over a year ago

These are very apropo for we Aunts:

DEAR ABBY ADMITTED SHE WAS AT A LOSS TO ANSWER THE FOLLOWING:

Dear Abby,

A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together, and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?

Dear Abby,

What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Fowl Language and Violence on my VCR?

Dear Abby,

I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his..

Dear Abby,

I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby,

I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.

Dear Abby,

Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby,

I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?

Dear Abby,

My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby,

I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby,

My mother is mean and short tempered I think she is going through mental pause.

Dear Abby,

You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?

Posted on 30 November 2011 @ 14:16 (London time) - permalink
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