| crystalgreen, posted
over a year ago
hi everyone.....
I have been with my partner for 2 years and for the first 1 year, we were like rabbits (to put it bluntly) I remember one weekend it was topping double figures...yes we were very into one another and couldnt keep our hands off the pair of us!
Just lately in the 2 year end of period as in last 2 months, our sex life has somewhat changed, we were at it a few times in the week to just now once as if not nothing in the week. What makes it harder is that now we are on holiday (no excuses hopefully) at nights he is tired even if we go to bed early?
The month before he was working really late and getting up at silly hours in the morning so I was really looking forward to this christmas holiday for the pair of us to chill and relax, but in this 2 week holiday, its only happened once and that was on his birthday because I suggested it, otherwise it wasnt happening!
I feel I am always instigating it lately and he says he is tired or I try and he is not able to get aroused as he use to, or excited.....I then think "is it me!". So I walk off in a huff and feel cold, and dont talk to him, which I dont think is a nice trait to have but its how I am feeling inside and its hard to express so being this way kind of helps!
When I asked him he said I read too many books on this (clearly I dont, I read up on psychology, not sex books?!?!) and that I am away with the fairies??? and make this up in my head.
I argued the case saying I dont think so because of the way its making me feel, he doesnt think there is any big deal. He then goes on to say that we still have a great sex life and there is nothing to worry about and shuts himself off completely from me. He says if its not one thing I am having a go at him about its another.....??? monthly I get ratty re PMT but this is something thats bothering me personally!
I dont suspect there is anyone else around him because we are together alot, but what worries me is me....the other weekend, I went out with the girls and met someone, who I was strongly attracted to and we have exchanged numbers with texts. He knows I have a partner and at the moment its just naughty text messages from him....which I miss from my current partner, he use to send continously and so did I, but its like since we are together at home, its routine time and I dont look forward to our usual time together, if anything at times I would rather be at work, we sit down at night together , watch a film or I read and he plays on his Xbox, but thats it....!
What I find hard is the communication, when I bring it up, even nicely, not shouting, he says I am making it up, going mad or lost the plot and to stop reading up on things like this....(when clearly that isnt the case at all) then he turns over, goes to sleep and I end up feeling like this..... he then gets up in the morning like nothing has happened....I have told him I feel upset and said maybe its best not to instigate it anymore and leave him to it, he said ok!
He just keeps on saying he is tired, but he has 10 hours of sleep in the last 2 weeks he has had off.....he then says, we will do it in the morning...but with that thought its become boring..not adventurous...so even my spark for it has gone because of how he is!
not sure what else to do, I dont want an affair by the way, I think I was just craving attention/to feel attractive. We still workout at the gym and keep fit and I am still attracted to him, he does give me affection, kisses me, but no compliments are flying over as of late, so there is me constantly wanting to better myself, different makeup, change of clothes because I am starting to feel insecure.....for my sins!! lol
any help....
yours almost giving up.....
Posted on 30 December 2009 @ 16:9 (London time) - permalink
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daisydiane, posted
over a year ago