| dh007, posted
over a year ago
Please , please help . I'm married to the most amazing woman on the plant , but when she has had too much to drink , she becomes , verbally and physically (slaps, scratches and punches) abusive , my wife is a trained Kick-Boxer and is about my weight but a bit shorter. This has been going on for some 18 months now and I sometimes drink far too much so i can handle her in these outbursts, whereby we have a confrontation. We currently live aboard and it is just the two of us , we got married in the May of this year , but two days prior to the wedding her abuse went to new level(verbal abuse , kicks , slaps and punches) and i cancelled the wedding , but after her promises to stop and deep felt apology i got the wedding back on track. Her family history is full of abusive situations and characters , whilst i have never experience any form of abuse in my childhood or adult hood. Since the wedding i appears we have had a honey moon period , but alas the abuse has returned with more verbal assaults and head-but , slaps etc , all fueled whilst she is semi-drunk. I personally have been under extreme pressure with the new professional job i carry out overseas , my wife can't work so just thinks she is on holiday all the time. Financial issues have hit us recently and through such i have been feeling really blue and down , my wife has tried to raise my spirits. We have both spoken calmly about our situation and come up with a game plan together. But this weekend further argument and confrontation erupted , we were both drinking and relaxing together , and i stupidly asked my wife to slap me (stupid , stupid i'm and intelligent man ) i think i was testing her. So i endured a barrage of slaps and punches , but i then i in turn complete lost control and punched her , splitting her lip. I feel so ashamed and i have broken every vow of my upbringing and morality as a man. I'm not a bad man but i feel so guilty , that i have let someone so badly influence possible my character. My wife if very upset and has made numerous threats , "I'm not a man to have done this" , "that i don't love her" , "You do this to me again and i'll really hurt you" , non of this is true i madly / deeply / truly love my wife and i don't know how to fix this or help her with her abusive tendancies, please help as my outburst was so out of character and against all my values that i hold dear and it is eating me up side that i have truly ashamed my whole family.
Posted on 4 August 2008 @ 19:49 (London time) - permalink
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