| boffo15, posted
over a year ago
What do you do when you have gotten yourself in to deep to quickly? That’s the big money question.
Ok so bottom line is I messed up. In my own weakass defense I can say that since I had not been in a relationship in a very long time I was happy to hit fast forward. Anyways onto the story…
I met a nice girl (I won’t bore you with the semantics of the meeting) it was readily apparent that she liked me. It had been some time since an attractive girl liked me. I was flattered and excited. She had a kid and even though I had never dated anyone with a child before I thought what the hell.
The relationship moved on at breakneck speed, and one day at lunch (no more than six weeks into the relationship) I told her I loved her. It took her a little while to respond, but she was happy. I knew almost immediately I shouldn’t have said it, but like any person I wanted affirmation that she was into me to. So like a butt-munch I said it again and again and explained how she didn’t have to respond, but I wanted her to know how I felt. Well she did respond in a positive manner, but I was now freaked.
Well things have not gone as planned. She is head over heels and I am back tracking. The thing is I really like her, but get very little time to spend with her. The kid runs the show, and it drives me crazy. We have completely different parenting philosophies. I believe children have there place, but must be respectful and conform to a certain amount of discipline. Her actions dictate that the kid does exactly she wants. This is just too far out of my comfort zone. I also am not allowed to voice my opinion. I am now being charged with the accountability of the situation without the authority that should go along with it.
I really like her and would like to see things work out, but we are talking about the rest of our lives together, and we can’t even decide how to raise a kid. It is a lose-lose situation. We will not progress until we figure out the latter, but she is seven years into the raising of the child and is not about to change now.
I feel guilty as I have led her on and I feel guilty as she had given up on men. I think if it ends she will hate me (rightfully so) and she will give up on relationships. I know this isn’t my issue, but I don’t want to be the final straw that pushes someone so amazing in to a life of solitude. I am so confused. I know I have a responsibility here, but I am not sure how big. Any help?
Posted on 3 May 2008 @ 20:4 (London time) - permalink
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